October 29, 2005

somewhere green

in my daydreams about my future life, i see myself in scotland in a tweed coat, a lovely brown scarf, tall brown boots, pulling a red wagon with two beautiful children. i am their nanny and i love them. i think they would call me miss hill or miss hill-ry. how that would sound with an accent, i have no idea, but i can't wait to hear it. i have had this daydream for quite some time now. but my only draw back is that it has been just a far fetched thought that would never come true. i would call it my unrealistic goal. to move to scotland as a nanny, find a small local church and help help help and live in that green place for a year or more. it wasn't until recently that i have decided that it isn't as unrealistic as i thought. so why couldn't i do this? i have, other than family, no strings to tie me down here. no job, no man, no house, and only a few more bills...i always think of this dream with fuzzy edges around it and not quite crisp. kinda the way movies do when they are showing a dream sequence. but recently it has become clear, sharp. part of this might be the opportunity i MAY have this summer. i am putting an application in for MMT to go to the UK for a month. MMT stands for making timothys tomorrow. each team is lead by bob landis. he is a very funny and amazing man. he has a huge desire to serve the Lord and is very warm. he gave me the application to fill out and i have all but one thing left to do and i will turn it in. i would be going to edinburgh...and that is the city i want to live in. it would be the best possible exposure ever...seeing the city for the first time on a missions team. i am getting butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. the possibility of going on this trip is overwhelming, but the most exciting thing ever. pray with me that the Lord would work his will in my heart. that i would push forward, and if he decides to close the door, that i would be happy in his will.

Posted by hill at 01:24 PM | Comments (7)

October 01, 2005

favorite falls

ohio in the fall is one of the most beautiful things to me. oak trees turning yellow then the leaves falling down down down. walking around in jeans and a sweater in the cold grass, barefoot. smelling the smells of fall. the dry crisp air. the smell of fires in the fireplaces. the smell of the fermented apples on the ground. the smell of almost winter in the air. the sound of the dry corn rustling in the wind and of tractors harvesting the crops. fall is my favorite. just cool enough to wear a sweater, not too cold to wear a coat. tweed, browns, earth tones. being able to walk down the sidewalk and crunch the leaves and acorn hats.

i remember when we lived in ohio i would go out back of the house and pick the best apples i could find from our trees and make a french apple pie. the nice warm comfy smell of cooking apple pie is wonderful. mom would make apple cider and float oranges studded with cloves in pretty designs in it. mom and i would go down swope road near our house with scissors and cut bittersweet to decorate the house with. it is a beautifully bright orange berry that grows in proliferation in ohio. mom would drape it all around the tin punched light fixtures in the house and on the mantels of all the fireplaces. we would also get hedge apples and put them on the front porch along with the pumpkins from the neighbors. mom would also start making soups again. i love soup season. thick hearty brunswick stew, scarlett's "secret" corn chowder, chili with sour cream and cheese, split pea and ham, this amazing chicken noodle soup that is beyond description....and gumbos, stews and more stews. i love mom's vegetable soup. when we lived in ohio the farmers would bring us corn, squash, zucchini, tomatoes, green beans and all sorts of other fresh veggies. so mom would make up huge pots of veggie soup. but our veggie soup had roast in it. big chunks of lovely beef with all the veggies. oh my. there is nothing in the world like it.

when i have my own house, if i ever do, i will have a window seat with big heavy curtains to hide me from the house world, but open me up to the outside world. sit with a cup of hot cider or tea and read a book ensconced in blankets and pillows. slip into charles dickens world. feeling sad when the book ends feeling the sense of loss. finally realizing that these people did not live, except in my mind.

i love fall time. everything is so sharp but warm. it reminds me of when i was little and going to papaw and mamaw's playing football with my many many cousins. or going to grandma and grandpa's and playing with my cousins there in the creek. one time we were hiking down the creek, just past the clay mine (a bank in a curve of the creek where there was clay-like dirt. we would sit for hours making "beautiful" pottery) and we found a big cloth. it had large patches of redish rusty spots on it. we made this big huge story that a man had been killed and buried somewhere in the field next to the creek and the murderer had thrown the cloth into the creek hoping to erase his trail. i remember one time mer and i smuggled some matches out of g'ma and g'pa's house and at night time we snuck down to the creek and lit a fire. we got to scared to let it burn too long so we covered it in sand and water and ran back to the house. dad found out later what happened.

i remember one fall when i was in high school raking leaves for hours. we had huge oak trees around our house in ohio, and leaves would fall and fall and fall. i had just gotten a new sweater and was barefoot and decided to jump in the leaves. it was wonderful. being thrown back to childhood for a little bit. it spread out the leaves again, but i didn't care.

i am so happy it is fall time again. it makes me think of warm happy things. enjoy the season. find a beautiful leaf, write a note on it and hand it to a friend. drink a mug of hot cider. read a beautiful book.

Posted by hill at 01:48 PM | Comments (7)