the tea of death and destruction.

so i was innocently minding my own business today when i decided i was way too groggy for my own good. so i thought to myself, "self i should get a cup of tea!" i got so excited and replied to myself, "self, you are a genius! i just happen to have brought a cup of lady grey tea just this morning for the purpose of de-groggification!"

so i happily trotted off to the snack shoppe to get myself a nice cup of lady grey tea. how innocent and young i was at that time in my life. how stupid and naive i was.

i got the cup and got the tea and set about to get the hot water. all was going fine and dandy...until...THE LID. now THE LID didn't fit. i tried and tried to get THE LID to fit, but it didn't fit onto the cup. it was false advertisement i think. because they had THE LID sitting next to the cups of my desired size. so i was led astray falsely. so happy was i trying to get THE LID to fit when all of a sudden, there was mass rebellion. how can one control it? how can one tell THE LID and the cup to behave and be good and do the job they were intended to do. one doesn't just grin and bear it. one jumps up and down and throws a fit and stomps on the nearest bald bohemian midget one can find.

"what happened, hillary?" you may be asking yourself. well, it happened like this. THE LID jumped off into the trash and the tea (scalding hot may i remind my readers) jumped on to my jumper! (i am wearing a jumper today by the way.) so here i was in the middle of the snack shoppe with a lap full with tea of death and destruction.

"what is the moral of the story, hillary?" you may be asking. hold on.

MORAL: never go white water rafting with racoons. it only leads to one of you getting hurt. and almost 99.9999999999% of the time it is NOT the racoon that gets hurt!