another injection today

I got an LSB this morning. They did two again like last time to cover both my right foot and knee. We talked a bit about the hyperbaric oxygen therapy that might help me and I found out from the doctor they have the facilities, but they don't have the the plumbing done. Like some horrible joke. I gather from what he said, it's been like that for a significant amount of time. The doctors petitioned for the higher ups to finish the work, but the PTBs said it was too much money.
The article explains it better than I understood at the time, and I see that there really is quite a bit involved. But...the usefulness of the treatment to our troops and even civilians in the area seems to be a good reason to get funding for it. Why outsource when you are half way to the goal of inhouse?

feeling somewhat better

Well, I saw the doctor and got medicine. I'm feeling a lot better since this afternoon, the medicine has helped a lot. (My fever had already broken by morning anyway.) Thanks for your prayers.

illness part deux

Well, my sickness grew into a stomach virus, but my fever is down and my throat is a feeling little better. The nausea has gone away too. I'm still going to the doctor tomorrow.

illness

I'm pretty sick. I have a sore throat and head cold. I have an appointment for tomorrow morning to see a doctor. Please pray for me. I am supposed to play the piano for the children's Christmas program on Sunday. There is rehearsal tonight that I'll likely miss, but hopefully I can be well enough to play rehearsal on Saturday and the program Sunday.

Please pray especially that this doesn't go to my ears. Last time this happened I got ear infections and lost the ability to hear music clearly for days. It was a bit tortuous.

Naseated and awake

I'm still awake...It's 5:12 am EST. I even took an Ambien. Yikes. I feel so nauseated. I can't move without getting waves and waves of it. I'm trying to be very still. I hope I'm not coming down with a virus or something. Yuck. Ugh, thinking about it is making me feel worse.

Well, this hasn't been a very uplifting post.

Have a great day at school, work or where ever you are.

RSDS update

I had a hard time with my LSB yesterday. I woke up during the procedure in so much pain the doctor removed the needle and asked if I wanted to stop. But with a little more anesthetic I managed to continue. It was just a little unusual. I usually don't remember the procedure much at all as if I slept through the whole thing.

My back is pretty sore, but my RSD pain is feeling better today.

what's up with jbo

We just had a nice visit with our aunt and uncle who came up from N.C. This aunt is my mother's sister. On Saturday my parents and our visitors took their tools with them and created two beautiful flowerbeds in front of the house. They really look good now, but in bloom and with growth I can only imagine how nice it will be.

Between the few jobs I've been doing I am hoping to have enough money to cover Finale 2007 upgrade and a newer 88 key MIDI capable (most are) keyboard that doesn't have cheap plastic keys. I will do what I can to find a good one and a good deal, but the keyboard I have now--though functional--is archaic to say the least. And it doesn't have enough keys to play live recordings or functionality to record velocity and other MIDI attributes. I'm really looking forward to these improvements so I can return to composing with a vigor. I have missed it so much and have longed for it quite enough. Now I am going to dig in.

On the RSD front, I'll be getting a lumbar sympathetic block on June 29. We will see how that helps and assess the situation from there.

And I'll try to be on my computer updating my blog and saying hi to people through email and chat more often. I have been feeling a bit better these past few weeks.

But now it is 2:30 am and way past my bed time.

To all the saints scattered throughout all the world,
grace and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

SCS x 2

I had my first appointment at Pain Management Clinic, Portsmouth on November 1 (that is, since I've been back in the Naval healthcare system). The good old Portsmouth Naval Medical Center. I was last there for pain managment three years ago this January. Some of the doctors and nurses remembered me. In fact, the doctor I have there now was one of the doctors who treated me while I was attending BJU.

He has suggested that I try another Spinal Cord Stimulator. Although I'm not keen to go through the process again, he might be right that it worked before and might work better with a new system. He preferes to use a different company than I had before. He believes his brand is tried and true. I will not be having any SCS procedures until January 2007 at the earliest.

insurance trials and tribulations

You never want to have insurance woes when you're trying to purchase your $400 medication that you absolutely need and cannot go off suddenly. Or the sleep medication that makes it possible to get through a night in relative peace. Or the pain medication, that once again you cannot stop taking suddenly or you will be in serious trouble.

Fortunately, the pain meds weren't that expensive and I could lose some sleep. And thank God for medication samples doctors give you. That got me through this little hump.

And once again, God comes through with His ways better than ours. I was issued a military ID this morning bright and early. And with that shiny new card I was able to purchase all three of my medicines.

This means I probably won't be going to Duke again for a while unless some amazing innovation in RSDS treatment comes out that would work for me.

I have a BLOG!

I thought, you know I have I blog: I could use it!
I guess I've just not been into the blogger mode recently. How about you? It was cool for a few years, but it has lost it's sheen for me. Okay...maybe not, maybe I just don't make it to my computer desk as much. But I have a laptop now. The computer comes with me to my bed.

I am feeling so much better today I had to let the world know. I have just come out of a horrible sick/low/down/dank/dark/icky spell. So much pain it was driving me crazy. I slept a lot. Probably too much. But I felt so much better today that you wouldn't believe it.

I can say that I was still rejoicing in God. But I will be the first to admit, (and I don't think He minds) that it is nice to rejoice in Him without the pain.

So I say, "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice."
Philippians 4:4 (Show me Philippians 4)

update

I am doing somewhat better since I had my bandages removed yesterday. My dad did the honors, and despite my apprehension they came off easily. Last time I wasn't so lucky. The bandages always seem to make my back stiffer. Once they are off, it is always such a relief. I have staples this time, instead of stitches (11 down and 9 across--middle of the back and lower right side respectively). They will be removed this coming Friday by my PCM. Thankfully, I don't have to go back to Durham for that.

Thanks for the notes and prayers.

success at Duke and home early

Well, my mother and I made it back from Durham today at 4:30. My surgery was moved up a bit. Fortunately, I was early to the medical center, so as soon as I walked in I was whisked away to surgery. Apparently the anesthesiologist knew how much I wanted to sleep right through this operation (I had to be awake for the previous three to answer questions), so he gave me plenty of medicine and I don't remember a thing: just going in and waking up in recovery. Just the way I like it. No one really needs to be awake during surgery on their back, imho.

I am feeling okay. This will probably be my last message for a while. I just wanted to say hi before I get on my bed and recover.

How I am...

I am doing all right on my medication. If I manage to take it all on time. I normally do, but there are times. I still am unable to do much, but I do have my good days. In fact, I went to Busch Gardens, Williamsburg with my family last Saturday. I had about two good hours there, and two bad ones, but overall I enjoyed it. I was hurting the next day (which was unfortunate since it was the Lord's Day), but I still went to church, managed to play for the services and it was a beautiful day, despite my discomfort.

I am enjoying the benifit of sleep medication now. Before, I had pain during my sleep which gave me the most horrid dreams, now I manage 5-6 hours of dreamless sleep. That is remarkable to me. The medication does seem to be slowly losing affectiveness, but I figure if I can get 5 hours, I can deal with the dreams the rest of the night. Fortunately, I am a lucid dreamer and can wake myself up usually if the dream is really bad.

I have decided to have my Spinal Cord Stimulator removed. Frankly, it is taking up space in my back, and I don't like it there. Especially with the risk involved without any of the benefits. So, on June 6, I will have surgery. But as a blessing, I will have the surgery at the Ambulatory Clinic instead of Duke University Hospital (they are very close to each other). I have had a better experience at the former than the latter, although I will have the same surgeon as before.

My doctor and I have discussed other options of treatment, and I will see her again on June 5. So there may be other avenues to take. We will see.

decisions, decisions

I visited Duke today. It was okay, really. My mom and I had brunch in Durham before my appointment, and eating really helped me feel a lot better. Just call that common sense, right?

So here's the news about the stimulator:

Dr. O will replace my electrodes/leads if I say yes. I haven't decided. But it will be a more serious surgery. He would have to make a larger incision in my back, and shave the bone of my spine to place this different kind of lead (called a plate, I believe). And he would have to do this by sight, which is why the incision is so much bigger. I'm not sure if this could be a day surgery, which would have insurance implications. I forgot to ask that question!

Here are the unknowns:

• There is no way to know if this will stop the pain or muscle spasms when the stimulator is on. It is just a best guess.
• There is no way to perfectly place the new leads, that is, they may not provide better stimulation -- it may be worse or none.
• There is more risk involved in the surgery itself.
• There is a greater recovery time.
• This could increase my pain.

So I am praying about this, and I'll let you know what I decide. If I say no, the stimulator comes out. So there will be one more surgery at least.

The other aspect I hope you will pray about is my medication. I am going up on it, and it might cause some side effects for a while. Pray it won't be so bad. And I'm trying one new medicine that might help me sleep better (and therefore get more rested).

I'll keep you apprised.
And I hope to be blogging more in the future. About more than my RSD, that is.

broken

I was at Duke today again. I'm really tired and worn out. A little discouraged too.
My stimulator could not be programmed. I started having back pain almost immediately when setting the stimulation levels. And beyond that, the stimulation started causing muscle spasms. So...we turned it off.

The doctors have no idea what is wrong. Obviously, there was a problem with the actual IPG that was replaced on December 5. It was deffective. But, it seems that was not the only problem to the system.

I will see my surgeon in about 3 weeks. I doubt I will continue with the stimulator; it looks like medication will be my best bet for pain management. Well, really God's grace.

allergic goodness

I am feeling much better today. But I am allergic to the tape that they use to secure the surgical drape, so I have a big square of itchy redness on my back that is driving me crazy. I think it might be a little better today. I basically have to lie on my back all day to keep from scratching it. And there is nothing to do for it. The doctors said not to put anything on it. It will go away by itself. Agh! But the incision is getting better.

I tried to use the stimulator once, but it made me feel bad. I need to heal some more. Plus, I will probably have to have it reprogrammed since the surgery was like getting a new IPG all over again. These old programs are from when the old IPG stopped working. So they are all turned up high and weird feeling. I might not be able to use them much.

the question answered

Well, we made it back at 7 something. I don't really remember when. I was checked into the hospital at 7h45. So about 12 hours. I was in the preop room with my IV and completely hooked up from 8 to 12h30. I was supposed to have surgery at 10h15. But...you know how it goes. I was very bored. No books aloud. No one to talk to. I couldn't sleep but for a few minutes near the end of the wait. So I listened and people watched (as much as I could without my glasses). There are many accents floating around Duke University Hospital. It was pleasant to hear. And also, I prayed. God was good too. The waiting really wasn't too bad, and the surgery even less so.

My mother said that the surgeon was very kind to her and patiently answered her questions. I found him still obnoxious and I was frustrated, but the rest of the team comforted me and encouraged me. Thankfully. I needed it.

They discovered fluid in the IPG battery (they are sending it to the lab to figure that one out). They removed it and replaced it. And when they did. It seemed like everything was fine. The new one turned on and I had parasthesia. It seemed like my programs were okay too.

Another plus, there's only one cut. And it isn't too big. I should heal pretty fast and not have a lot of pain. Or at least not too much. Thank you for all of your prayers on my behalf.

12.5.2005.10.15.

Well, my surgery is tomorrow at 10:15 am. I have to be there two hours early so my mom and I are driving up tonight.

The surgeon doesn't expect this will be as involved as the first one. Let's hope so.

books and duke

Well, we left at 6am this morning for Duke and got back home at 6h30pm. Not too bad for a day trip, right? I am ashamed to say, I slept most of the way there and back, but I didn't feel good. My mom had her Spanish tapes for company on the way back. She said practicing them is exhausting work. I believe it. Especially while driving in the dark and rain.

I had two appointments today. One at the Duke Univ. Clinic, where I had my preoperative appointment. They checked me out, took some blood and repeated the procedures I'd have to follow for Monday's surgery. Then we had lunch and headed over to my other appointment at the Pain Clinic. That appointment I was an hour and a half early for. But it really couldn't be helped since I had to come for the preop appointment. I managed to get back into Orson Scott Card's Ender's Game. It is about a futuristic earth at war with the "buggers"; the space force is looking for a general to lead the earth forces against these aliens that have almost annihilated earth 60 years before. They think they have found their general in a genius 6 year old, "Ender" Andrew Wiggin.

I have read the book before about 5 years ago, and I liked it. I went on a Card binge then, but I didn't read anymore of the books in the Ender Saga. I read other books by Card. One a fictional narrative called Sarah about Sarah and Abraham. How they met, and their entire lives. It was good if I recall it correctly. It was very interesting. I liked it a lot. If I remember correctly, Card wrote 3 books: Sarah, Rebekah and Rachael. But I never made it to the next ones because of school. I mean to read them some time. I have many such books on my list. Orson Scott Card is a Mormon. And he provides an interesting perspective on the biblical narrative. Especially his ideas about Sarah's barrenness, and Abraham's omission to Pharaoh about Sarah being his sister-wife.

I am reading Ender's Game now because Kyle has read the series, and he has been at me for ages to read them. I have wanted to, but I have very eclectic tastes with books and I am very finicky with what I read. I usually read several books at a time and can put a book down for weeks sometimes. I have a very good memory for the written word, so I can pick it up later and be right back into it. That's that way I work many times. Other times, I will go straight through something. Or a whole series like the Wheel of Time.

Thankful for Thanksgiving

We had a good time at the Sweede's house for Thanksgiving. They are a wonderful family in our church. We had a 19 1/2 pound turkey, rolls, rolls and more rolls. I like rolls. And pies and cake, and coffee (yuck) and tea. We talked about all sorts of stuff. Which means there were many literary references, and several English majors jokes.... We played a few rounds of Uno, which I lost every time (although, I did manage to start a draw-two pile that went all the way around to the person next to me--draw 10). It was good times. I'm too sleepy to write more. I am so thankful to God for my family and friends, for my church and all God has given me

How I'm doing...

I haven't find out for sure what is wrong with my SCS. I had a fluoro (fluoroscopy) done yesterday and the surgeon is going to compare that one with the one from the surgery. Brian, a technician from Advanced Bionics, came to try to reprogram my IPG. Out of sixteen contacts on the two leads I have, only two would work. Just barely. And not without pain.

This is what might have happened:
The leads may have migrated into the dura of my spine. (The dura is the tough fibrous membrane covering the brain and the spinal cord.) Now this may have only been a little movement. The surgeon did see anything noticeable right away from yesterdays pictures.

What is happening though, I am getting no paresthesia (i.e., therapy for the pain). I am, however, getting horrible back pain. So I am not using the stimulator at all until the doctor figures out what's up.

So...any questions?

Back to Duke

I am going to Duke again tomorrow. I found out last time I was there (a week ago) that there might be a serious problem that could mean another surgery. I hope not. I will explain more when the doctors figure everything out.

I should find out for sure what the doctors want to do. At least I think they are going to tell me. We will see.

My appointment is at 2 pm.
Because of the complication, I cannot use the stimulator at all. Thus my pain level is higher again. And I have had some (more) trouble sleeping.

Kyle and I will leave this morning at 9:30.

I can use all the prayers I can get.

summer vacation

I am going on vacation with my family to Texas. We are going to visit my grandparents and assorted uncles, aunts and cousins. It is a 24 hour trip by land; we drive straight through the night.

We are going to Alvin, Texas. Alvin is twelve miles southeast of Houston in northeast Brazoria County. You can see the city here.

We will be able to see the triplets in person. I am looking forward to it.
We are also going camping and visiting Austin. I've never been there (or at least don't remember being there), so it should be fun.

I should be able to send out some updates from there. Hope you are all well.

visit with chai on the side

Well, once again, good news from Duke. They have written off another not so insubstantial bill I had from them. God is good.

I was at Duke on Monday with Christa. The trip was topped off with a visit to a Chapel Hill Barnes and Noble to visit with Katherine. We had a nice visit, it was short, but good. And chai is always good.

the week after

I went to Duke on Thursday, June 23. Christa was able to take me because she is on summer break. I have now been driven down to Duke by all of my family members. I'm sure they are thrilled.

There is some good news. After considerable trouble on Fred's part (the Advanced Bionics technician assigned to me), my programming is now updated and helping me. I received a new remote control (same model though). The old one wasn't communicating with his laptop for some reason. Which is what precipitated the former programming disaster.

Christa and I had a nice drive. It wasn't too bad at all. And we went to Arby's.

courthouse

I was at the Greensville County Courthouse in Emporia, Virginia, today.^[1] Greensville County was formed in 1781, two hundred years before my birth. The the current courthouse was built in 1787.

I really wish I had had my camera with me. I really need to start bringing it when I go on trips like that. I was sitting there in front of the courthouse, I looked up at the columns and the letters and I knew I would have had a good picture. I have missed out on some good pictures in Durham, NC, also.

So my midyear's resolution is to start taking more pictures. I have always wanted to be more of a photographer (like my dad), but I feel intimidated by the camera. Does that make any sense? No. I'm sure. I've had a few photos from the lake around here. But since then, I haven't done too much. Oh, and as a non sequitur, I plan to learn how to play the guitar this summer.

^[1]It wasn't my ticket, I was there for.

blessings in the mail

I got a letter from Duke today. It was about the bill for my the trial SCS. They decided because of my joblessness due to my illness that they would cover 100% of the bill left over after what insurance paid. This was a lot of money. What a blessing from God! His grace is amazing.

I really didn't expect this at all. It was out of the blue. I really only filled out the forms because I needed to pay the bill off slowly, over a longer period of time.

This is such a great reminder how God wants to bless us and take care of us. He knows what's going on. He is the God who sees.

Great Friends

I'm in Greenville. As is my custom, I try to say hi from where ever I am.

Actually, I am at the source. I am at Ben's house. Yes, Ben himself. He and Stephanie are taking good care of me. I'm very thankful.

Plus, I got to see quite of few graduates and friends today at BJU. I am going to visit more with them later at some parties.

Lunch is ready. Signing off for now.
Coming home tomorrow.

down 85

I am going to Greenville tomorrow. I am going to get to see the ideaman and Mrs. Ubertati. Plus, I have quite a few friends graduating at Bob Jones this weekend.

Hope everyone has a good weekend. I'll be in the car most of it. But it is worth it to see some good friends, I haven't seen in a long while.

cousins x 3

Because of complications and health risks to my aunt, the doctors have decided to take the babies earlier than they had hoped. So I should have three new cousins very soon. Please pray her health.

And please pray for them. They are very small. They will be in the hospital for quite a while I'm sure. Also, their dad is in the Navy and he isn't in Houston right now. I guess he's probably trying to come home to see them.

Update: The boys were born on 04/21 on my grandfather's birthday (my mom's side, so no relation to them); they are doing well. They are breathing on their own. And their dad made it to town to see them.

Their names are Connor, Ian and Logan. Hopefully, I'll have some cute pictures soon. See left.

goodness stored up

Both of my bandages are off now. It is a relief to have them off, they pressed against the cuts and caused more pain. But seeing the cuts is another thing. I am half tempted to post pictures. That might be gross though. The incisions are like 4 inches. I didn't realize they would be that big. Okay, enough of that.

I have to go to Duke again tomorrow. I will be getting my SCS programmed again. Pray that we find some good programs. The ones I have now do not help me. My pain was really high today. I fell asleep at 7pm. Now I probably won't be able to sleep tonight very much.

All things considered, I am doing pretty well. Pray for me that I would be able to finish some wedding music I'm writing. For me writing the music out takes a while. I know I can do it, but sitting up at a computer is not my idea of a good time right now.

One other thing, I finished God's Secretaries. It really was a great book on the Translators of the King James. I really wish I hadn't put it down for so long. I had no problem getting back into Nicolson's narrative because I like his writing style, but I had trouble remembering some of the facts from early on. I have been thinking about reading it again. But I want to finish Paradise Lost first. The problem is the book is so heavy, I'm not supposed to lift it. I will write more about Secretaries later. There were some interesting facts. And I'll mention more about the book in general. Maybe provide some quotes and links to some of the more interesting historical facts.

Here is a verse I've drawn comfort from recently.

Oh, how abundant is your goodness,
which you have stored up for those who fear you
and worked for those who take refuge in you,
in the sight of the children of mankind!
Psalm 31:19

I'm home now.

Hey, I am back from Duke. I didn't have to stay over night! Praise God. I was really happy not to have to stay there. Also, the stimulator is programmed and running. It is not perfectly attuned yet, because we programmed it right after surgery, so I will be playing around with the controls and I'll meet with my Programmer on Tuesday to work on some more precision programs.

I am in a lot of pain, but mostly when I walk or move. So sitting or lying down still is okay. But walking and standing, not so fun. But I am really suprised how well I do feel. I have to be very careful especially these first 2 or 3 weeks to watch my movement. I am not allowed to pick up anything heavy or do any creative bending or turning side to side. The leads have to scar over to keep them positioned "permanently"; they could move if I am not careful right now. It takes 4-6 weeks to really get the healing done. I'll be meeting with the doctors several times for follow-ups.

Over all the experience wasn't too bad. I was awake most of the surgery, just heavily drugged. It was not pleasant drugging though unfortunately. But I made it through it. With God's help. Indeed. I remember some urgent calling to Him several times in the operating room.

We will see how this goes. I am very hopeful. Like I said, it is on and helps with my leg, but now my back is hurting. So it will be a while to see its full effects. But I am patient. Really.

Thanks for praying.
(I'm using Christa's laptop. I'll spell check later. Sorry for any problems. I have to go to bed now.)

SCS

I haven't been blogging. I really miss it. I just haven't felt like writing most of the time. I've been having a hard time. Fortunately, the time has come for my surgery. I will be going down to Duke tomorrow. Thursday is the surgery date though. And I have been told I'll have to stay overnight now. They have to observe me afterwards.

a date set

Wow. I just had a great call. The doctor's office at Duke. Yes, you guessed it. They wanted to schedule my surgery. They are on the ball this time. I didn't expect to hear from them for a while at least.

So here's the plan:

Wednesday, April 6 -- Pre-Op appointment

Thursday, April 7 -- Surgery

So (for review) this surgery will be to implant a spinal cord stimulator. This is will be the permanent placement.

And he said...

I had a fairly good doctors appointments yesterday at Duke. Everything was okay except it really was painfully taxing travelling there and back. And we were down there a lot longer than usual.

That's why I'm still up at 1 am.
The surgeon said late April. We'll see.

Oh, what made my day. When we were home that night I was sitting down stairs on my bed talking to Christa and my brother came in behind me and held a Snickers bar over my head. He had bought it for me at school that night. It was one of those supersized ones.

update

So I guess my blog has become an RSD/appointment alert system. Really, I would like to write more, but I have been ill more often since the SCS trial. I'm not sure why exactly because I haven't been more active. The doctor even raised my pain medication dosage, but that hasn't seemed to help.

But there is hope in sight. Tomorrow is my referral appointment with the surgeon for the permanent SCS device. It is at 3:30, but I have my regular appointment on the same day around 1. So it will be an all day event.

Once again I ask for your prayers. And if it is God's will it would be nice if the SCS surgery were soon.
I'll let you know what's going on when I get back.

Durham, NC

It's that time again when I head off to Duke for my 4 weeks appointment. I go to get my prescription and chat with my doctor. I am going to talk to her about break through pain, which is, well pain that breaks through. I am going to see if she will proscribe something fast-acting that will take care of flare ups so I don't have to cry in bed. Maybe I won't miss so much church (as I have been lately).

Anyway, 3½ hours there and 3½ hours back or thereabout. My mother will be my driver; I don't drive much anymore. The appointment may or may not take more than 15 minutes. I'm not bitter really. I am very thankful that I have been able to go to Duke.

The real appointment is March 15. As I have no doubt begun to drive you crazy with reminding you. That is when I will see the doctor that will do the final procedure for the spinal cord stimulator.

Qapla’

I'm back from Duke once again. The lead has been taken out of my back and the scs device returned. Dr. Pasi and I discussed the test, and I made my decision. I am going to get the permanent device.

So. It was a success. The new procedure should be scheduled probably in 4 weeks. I don't know anything else really.
thanks for your prayers.

Now that I don't have the scs, I've got the pain back and I want my remote control to turn the pain off.

i, borg

So. The day after the surgery is supposed to be your first journal day when trying out your spinal cord stimulator. But I slept a lot of the day away. That's okay though. I started moving around this afternoon. The stimulator is doing its job. Basically what I'm doing now is playing with my remote control to get the settings the way I like them.

Right now because the scs lead isn't permanently implanted, it moves around quite a bit (when I move, it moves). This causes the stimulation to go up and down, on and off. That takes some getting used to. And I have to figure out what is the optimal setting for sitting down, walking, lying down, etc.

But the trial is going pretty well. My back is sore, no doubt. But it'll get better. I was convinced that this was a very bad idea this morning when I was in so much pain and had only 3 hours of sleep, but now I see how my judgment might have been affected.

If I feel I can move around tomorrow I am going to go to church. I can't miss the Ephesians study in Sunday School after all.

version 0.5

I'm back. And my back is killing me. The surgery went very well. The trip back was hurtful, but I'm okay.

The scs is working. I don't really know how well so far, but I can feel the tingling more than the pain. I'll be going back on Monday to have the lead removed and discuss getting the permanent version. The upgrade, so to speak.

More later...

The Trial Has Come

It's snowing. It hasn't even been that long and it's sticking all over the place. My mother just made it home and she said it is pretty bad out there.

Okay. Here's the news. Tomorrow is the day I go down to Duke for my pre-op appointment. I'll talk to Dr. Pasi about the procedure, ask my questions, get all the information I can, then Friday will be the day.

I've said all this before, and I hate to bore you, but here's a recap. Friday morning, early, I'll have the procedure done. This Trial is where they put leads in my epidural space and connect it to a device known as a spinal cord stimulator. This device will hopefully interfere with the pain that I feel.
Now, I will only have this Trial device for a few days. I will probably have it removed on Monday. But that should give me enough time to know whether it will really helped more or not. 50% or more pain relief is considered success.
If it is successful I will have to heal for at least 2 weeks. Then they can do the final procedure.

Please pray that everything will go well.
And that the doctors will know whether to give me the RF device or the IPG. Right now my parents and I think the RF device will be better for me because it is rechargable (so the battery doesn't have to be replaced every few years) and has better control over the settings (in case my pain goes up or down). But I'll discuss the options with my doctor.

things...

The wedding of Danielle (Sweede) and Brian on the 18th was beautiful. Danielle is a good friend of mine from my church (BJ grad ’00 and ’02). Her family moved to VA Beach before mine, but since we moved here in 1987, we have gone to the same church.
So it wasn't just a friend that got married last weekend, it was one with whom I had grown up. Brian is a Cedarville grad, and a really good guy. The wedding was beautiful. Sarah C. (a grad of BJU) and I played together (she on the piano, I on the organ). It was great fun.
And Danielle and Brian both said that they believed the wedding was God honoring and a good witness to family members and friends there who aren't Christians. They are heading to Ohio on Tuesday. Brian works at Cederville as a Residence Hall director.

It took me a while to recover from the exertion, but it was well worth it. In the middle of the week, I went to Duke. And it turns out my doctor wasn't even there. So I didn't have an appointment; I just got my prescription and went on to my Aunt's house. It was really great to see her and my cousins and my cousins' children. I miss them so much. They are the closest of my cousins and in the past years it has been the hardest to see them it seems.

We returned from NC on Thursday night. It was a long trip--well it really wasn't, it just felt like it to me. Christa and I watched a movie on her laptop while my Mom drove. Then Christa took over for the home stretch. I like be chauffeured, you see.

Christmas was wonderful. Our family read the Christmas story together and exchanged gifts. For all you artists out there, who know me, listen to this: I got an introductory art set (colored pencils, watercolor paints, poster paints, oil pastels, etc.). It comes with a book that introduces everything. I'll post my creations for a good laugh posterity.
Christa gave me a calligraphy set with the same premise (i.e. to introduce the art form). My parents and sister really surprised me with these gifts. I had no idea. And I love them. Oh, I should add my brother got me a set of colored (black, red, green and blue) Pilot g-2 pens. I love Pilot gel pens. They are the best. I think I have only written one time in my church notes with a different kind of pen. And that was because I dropped my g-2! Kyle knew exactly what I'd like.

Finally, on recommendation of David, my parents bought me A Handbook for New Testament Greek. That's the book that BJU produces for its students.

I hope everyone is doing well. I have been reading Psalm 145 over and over. I set a goal to meditate on these two attributes of God today, like David said.

⁵On the glorious splendor of Your majesty And on Your wonderful works, I will meditate.

Well, it turns out today, everything going on in my life caught up to me. I had fever and I had my tissue box next to me and I was under the covers almost all day. But...even feeling so bad, I could never get away from His wonderful works. In my life. In my family's. In our church. In the world. God is so good.

p.s.
It snowed. We got two inches...the day after Christmas. But it was wonderful.
Oh, and this is better. Texas (Alvin--where my family is from, and Kingsville--where we used to live) got snow. It hadn't snowed there since 1989 (I think that's what my mom said.) Anyway, my grandmother loved it. She went outside and built a snowman.

Holiday Proclamation

Merry Thanksgiving and Happy Christmas!

My Mother made strawberry pie for us today. She is the best!
Dinner was superb as well.
Everyone seemed to have plans, so it was just the five of us today. With Christa back from grad school, it was nice to have the family all gathered around the table together for Thanksgiving.
After dinner Christa, Kyle and I went to the park and threw the football around. It was cold though. It was nice to get out of the house though. I haven't done that in a while.

 1Praise the LORD!
Praise God in his sanctuary;
   praise him in his mighty heavens!
2Praise him for his mighty deeds;
   praise him according to his excellent greatness!
3Praise him with trumpet sound;
   praise him with lute and harp!
4Praise him with tambourine and dance;
   praise him with strings and pipe!
5Praise him with sounding cymbals;
   praise him with loud clashing cymbals!
6Let everything that has breath praise the LORD!
Praise the LORD!

Pictures in Memory

I was thinking of Matt Peacock a little after I saw Gwen's blog after getting home from Duke.

Matt was quite a character. Here are some pictures of our little group back in 2000.

Bible Conference 2000

Left to Right:
Back Row: Ben Y., Aaron B., Julie L.
Middle Row: Bevin R., Simon B., Tim D., Micah B., Steve, Gabe E.
Front Row: Desiree B., Tracy D., Joanna T., Torey F., Megan F., Matt P.

At the Planter 2000

acreative

I feel like every atom of creativity has oozed out of me. I can't write any music. I have hardly blogged. I haven't worked on any of my stories. I hardly practice/play the piano. I haven't sculpted or painted recently. Oh wait, I don't do those last few things.

I have no energy. The sun will come out tomorrow, right?

fatigue

I am at the point where I am tired of being tired. I don't seem to be able to sleep well anymore.

It's a good thing God doesn't get tired. And He never sleeps.

quiet

I am printing an 8th grade grammar test for my sister. My printer seems to be the one working the best for now.

I don't usually get up at 6:00 am if I can avoid it. I've never been a morning person, so to speak. If I do get up early, I like solitude and quiet. No talking. No loud sounds. Sometimes this lasts for hours. I would just do a little hand wave to my roommates' good morning. And now I do it to my family as well. No speaking. Only the quiet morning.

Sometimes I think I am too quiet.

new bible program

After telling you about QuickVerse 7 and "free" software, let me tell you about something that is really free and seems to be really nice.

e-Sword Home - the best free Bible study software for Windows

This seems to be nicely developed software and very well thought out (from a laymen's perspecitive, if that is the right terminology).

I downloaded about every module offered and I ended up withover 600MG. But that was everything.

Of course the website has the details, but let me give you some notes:

• Bibles
• ESV
• KJV
• KJV with Strong's Numbers and Voice, Tense and Mood
• Greek
• Hebrew
• etc.
• Commentaries
• Barnes
• Clark
• Darby
• Gill
• Jamieson, Fausset, and Brown
• Keil and Delitzsch
• etc.
• Dictionaries and Encyclopedias
• Websters 1828
• BDB Hebrew Definitions
• Easton
• International Standard Bible Encyclopedia
• etc.
• Graphics
• American Bible Society Maps
• Classic Bible Maps
• Son Light Bible Atlas
• etc.
• Devotions
• and other extra modules

There is nice tutorial that is on the website and probably included in the Help File. I think the biggest module I downloaded was 17MG.

So, if you have the time and the patience, this is an excellent rescource for Christians. And it is all free.

misc.

So guess who called me? None other than Simon and Rebecca Baum. It was really good to hear from them. It has been a long while. They are doing very well. In fact, they are going on vacation.

In other news, I played for a wedding today. It was very nice. And I manged well enough. I haven't been feeling well lately, so God has supplied grace as always. I am most thankful that the auditorium was cool today for the service. During the rehearsal (which was way too long), it was very hot. I could hardly breathe, and I really thought I was going to have leave. It was cooler outside in the 91 degree weather. But really, it was a nice ceremony.

In other news, since I like to go out of chronological order: Wednesday night at our prayer meeting a small group sang. Between the 7 of us we manged four-part (mixed) harmony. Now, for a church as small as ours it was a feat. Praise God. And I am looking forward to more singing in harmony -- literally. I thank God once again, for bringing musicians to the assembly. I've been waiting...hmm...wow. I think this has been on my prayer list for 10 years.

I'm going back to Duke in the middle of September. Pray, pray, pray that they will schedule the trial. God's will be done.

One last thing...I got my CD today. My "free" CD. It works beautifully, although I had a little trouble installing it over the intranet.
I am refering to this CD.
I have used QuickVerse for years and years, so I was very excited to be getting 7 (not even their latest version, but), I've been using 3 for all this time. Plus, all these books. Now, I know some of this stuff you can get right off the internet. But I really like having it right there on my computer. And so far it seems very nice. I really love the language tools (Greek, Hebrew lexicons, Strong's, voice, tense, mood, etc.).

The first CD is "free" in that you have to pay for shipping, which is $7ish. You can purchase other cds too. Plus, if you get the "free" CD you can get other "free" offers that last up two 2 years.

So far, this seems like a good deal, even if you only get the "free" ones.

happy news

My friends got engaged!!! This happened yesterday sometime. Haven't heard the story yet. Dianna's birthday was on Wednesday, and Greg drove down to surprise her. The surprise was a complete success.

Congratulations Dianna and Greg! May God bless you.

fine

Well, I finished the music for the DVD. All 8 minutes and 29 seconds. Or thereabout. It is not for my family reunion, but for my dad's boss's family reunion coming this weekend.

I scanned about 100 slides and my dad made a DVD of them. It will be played this Friday or Saturday. (It's a two day afair.)

I enjoyed writing the music. I was a bit stressed getting it done. I waited until the last minute of course. But, I think it turned out fairly well. It has three parts. ABCCAB, or at least that's how I figure it. Although, if anything B is the main theme, C is the secondary and A is a intro/bridge. I'd like to think I was professional about the music, but I was really just trying to make it sound pleasant. I haven't ruled out the possibility of reworking it completely, but for now I am going to leave it.

I will put it up as an mp3 probably, but it will be a large file, no doubt, because it is so long. Download at your own peril. I will try to shrink the mp3 a little, but computer music loses respectability if it loses sound quality. It also helps to have good speakers. Or if I just had my gigasamplers this wouldn't be a problem.

Here's the music, it's 8meg.

just visiting

So I went to the doctor again yesterday. I'm going to increase pain pills again. We'll see if that helps. About the trial. Hmm...don't know when that is happening. I won't be going back to Duke for about 8 weeks. So unless the doctor calls to schedule something before that, we'll be into September before anything happens. Meanwhile, I sit at home.

I have been writing music for a dvd that will be played at a family reunion. That has been something to do. Before that I wrote a song for our church's dedication of our Family Life Center.

And I realize I have forsaken blogging. I didn't want to be like some other guy I know, <cough> HatShop </cough> ;-) So that's my life alla breve.

natural bridge, part II

Natural Bridge, VA was amazing. It is a testament to God's handiwork, really. It certainly looks hand crafted to me.

The presentation at night was interesting. They did a light show on the rocks as they read Genesis 1. It was interesting to hear

And God said, "Let there be light!"

booming down from the bridge. Oh, and when you see the pictures realize that there is a road going over it for perspective's sake.

You sit on one side of the bridge for half of the show, and on the other side for the finale. The ending starts with the song The Lord's Prayer, then the last days of Creation. The finale is more singing; beautiful renditions of two songs: God Be With You 'Til We Meet Again and one of my all time favorites Holy, Holy, Holy.

Christa and I couldn't help but sing with the choir at the end. And the bells resounded all the way down the path. It was one of the most lovely arrangements of Holy, Holy, Holy I've ever heard.

Thomas Jefferson used to own the bridge, back in the day. Christa and I were wondering who owns it now that this highly religious performance can continue. I haven't found out yet.

Well, here are the pics.

assorted thoughts and pictures

Okay, so I haven't posted in a while. I'm sorry. I need to write more. And I don't mean fluff. I want to really write some of the crazy things in my head. For posterity. And for your amusement.

I have been working on my constructed language. That has been nice.
And I composed a new tune for Fanny Crosby's poem To God Be the Glory. I have been "working."

And as a special treat I have pictures for you. These are from my little vacation to CO for Ben and Stephanie Young's wedding. The pictures are not that good. I'm working on the whole photographer thing.

pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Things I've learned about cameras and taking pictures

1. recharge camera before you leave


2. turn off flash when taking pictures through windows


3. push Kammer out of frame


4. recharge camera when you have arrived at hotel


5. don't forget the 35mm

natural bridge

My family and I are going on a little vacation tomorrow and Saturday. We are staying at A Thousand Trails campground near Lynchberg. But our main goal is to visit Natural Bridge, VA. My parents have been there before and liked it very much.

We are leaving bright and early in the morning.

home

I made it home around 11 pm EST. I had a 2 hour delay in the plane at Denver because the right engine wouldn't start. But that made my wait in Atlanta go by quicker.

I called my Dad by pay phone to tell him I had arived earlier than expected and I was going to sit outside, but when the phone started ringing I actually heard his phone ring too inside the airport. He was right across from the pay phone on a bench. Funny.

All in all, it was a good flight home. I have pictures as promised. I will get them up when I can.

Oh, I got to meet Joy. It was fun talking with her. She is an awesome photographer by the way, don't let her tell you anything different.

the mountain top

I'm sitting in a hotel in Colorado. It's hard to believe. I left Greenville on Wednesday morning. We made it to NC pretty fast. TN was our next state to cross. After that we went to Kentucky, Illinois, and Missouri.

We stopped in St. Louis for dinner. It was so odd. It was about 6:30 and there was no one around. It was like the city was empty. (We were downtown, by the way.) We ate dinner in the pizza place. It was okay, the pizza was a little greasy, though. There was a policeman there who explained that when the Cardinals were away, downtown pretty much shuts down at 6. Even with the explanation it felt bizarre walking around this huge city without any people walked with us.

Next we went through Kansas City, Missouri and Kansas City, Kansas. It was pretty dark though, so we didn't see much. After that we hit Topeka and were well on our way through Kansas. Boy is it flat there. We stopped at sunrise to get pictures on the side of the road. It was so cold we were jumping around. My teeth were chattering. I didn't pack for cold weather.

After Kansas we made it to Colorado. It was beautiful. Denver was really nice. We ate downtown and walked around for a bit. Then we headed for Rocky Mountains National Park. We were able to go up Trail Ridge (?) Road. All the way up to the snowy peaks. I wasn't as brave as Justin, Brannon, and Ben, but I was near the edges occasionally. We were up 12,000 ft. It was incredible. I have never even imagined.

We camped in the national park. We hiked (I thought I was going to die) up a steep hill for quite a ways. Put up our tent; had hotdogs over our cooking "stove"; talked and laughed. We were only missing the camping songs, I guess.

This morning we packed up, (the hike down was easier than up, but not by much) and headed to Ft. Collins. An unfortunate turn of events lead us to Wyoming, we missed the exit. Wyoming wasn't the bad part though, it was the almost running out of gas. There are miles of nothing in the West. But everything was fine. We fount Ft. Collins, and met the Geters. Saw Ben and Stephanie and the Youngs. Went to the hotel and now I am sitting here typing on an unfimiliar Mac.

I had one bad experience in this whole thing. I forgot to charge my camera. It died when I was just starting to take pics of the mountains. Oh well.

and we're off...

Well, I made it to Greenville all right. Thankfully, my sister enjoys driving, and knows the drive so well. I am sitting in Ben's wonderful house in Greer. Ben, Kammer, Brannon, Davidand I had a nice talk this evening.

I'll be leaving with Kammer, Brannon and Justin in the morning for our trek to CO for Ben's wedding. It will be good times.

The wedding is on Saturday. I'll be flying home all day on Sunday.
And in the near future, I'll be returning to Duke for another doctor's appointment: June 10.

trippin'

I wish I knew where cities were better. You'd think I'd know the United States' map a little better. So, I am going to Fort Collins for a wedding this week. I am very excited because I haven't been past Texas. I'll take pictures. I promise.

pictures finally

jbo: a party to remember

Here are some pictures from the party that I promised so long ago.

psycho

I have a Duke appointment tomorrow. But this will be with a different doctor. It is the biofeedback and evaluation process I must undergo before I can have the trial to see if spinal chord stimulation will work for me.

Of all things this evaluation makes me the most nervous.

"The initial visit involves evaluation of psychological, social, and physiological aspects of the presenting symptoms." This test takes 3 hours.

meetings and partings

The trip back to Virginia Beach was tiring...even while I was asleep...I had very real dreams. Some people dream in color or black and white, sometimes I dream in pain. We were a bit cramped carrying some of Christa's belongings from Greenville. But we made it.

I got to meet a blogger that has been linked to from Ben's Friends before at Trinity Baptist Church in Gaffney, South Carolina. It's always nice to meet fellow bloggers. Even if it is awkward walking up to them and saying, "I read your blog...I feel like I sort of know you...but don't. Nice to meet you." Or something like that.

a party to remember

I'm at Hillary's House. This is awesome!

I have to go now though! It was a cool party. They are nice people. I'll put pictures up later.

play, concert and calamari

I managed to sleep all 7 hours from Virginia Beach to Greenville. Sleeping in a car is definately my superpower. This doesn't bode well for my driving though, black dogs and all.

I did get to see the play. And since I was so well rested, I enjoyed it immensely. I went to the Green Room afterwards to see Ginger and Geoff and Mrs. Jacobson. It was delightful to see them again. It has been a while. Mrs. Jacobson was my high school English teacher. I miss her.

Thanks to Mrs. St. John, blessings on her head, I got to go to the Commencement Concert which also was delightful. (They played Saint-Saéns' Maestoso" section from his Symphony No. 3. Dr. Dunbar played the organ. It was so beautiful. It needed to be a little louder.)
Also, I have never heard BJ choirs sound so good. Of course I've been away, so maybe I have forgotten. But they were singing Rutter, and I could understand their Latin. That is a feat. The guys were very clear, and the ladies hit their high notes with grace. It was remarkable.
Finally, Dr. Gus premiered a song about Job 38:7 (when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy). It was beautiful. It ended spectacularly with the tune Nicea. You could hear the brass singing "Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty!" It was a blessing.

There was an amusing story in there before the concert I left out. Christa and I went to Olive Garden with grandmothers, parents, aunt and brother. But we had barely sat down before we had to leave for the concert. The wait was long, and we didn't make it there early enough. But, I did get my fried calamari, bread and salad. You have to take a stand for some things in life.

convocation

Well, I'll be leaving in the morning to go to Greenville. I'll be there just in time to see the play (go Ginger Jacob/Ericson!). I'm not sure if I'll make it to the Commencement Concert. We will see.

So Christa is getting her Masters. Wow. I'm so proud.

prayer request

My uncle had a massive stroke today. He is in the hospital in intensive care. Please pray for God's healing and for his family. His name is Tony.

thank you.

on the inside

I have another Duke appointment tomorrow. It is going to be a pretty big deal too. I will be discussing further treatment options with my doctor. As you may remember the new pain medication didn't agree with me so much at first. The lower dosage helps, but not enough if I were to be out really doing something demanding. But the good news is the combination I was on previously is what was causing my sleepiness/non-musicness/non-writingness. So that is over and done with. I am much happier and active now. I have been playing the piano and working on music.

Now, without grossing you out (hopefully) the next step the doctor wants me to take (most likely) is spinal chord stimulation. That is, by a needle, leads are inserted into the epidural space (above the spinal column) and connected either to a battery in my side or to an RF transponder (thingy). [This sounds all technical, but I am only pretending to know exactly what I am talking about to give you an idea what they want to do; I watched a video. Very entertaining.]

This stimulation interrupts the neural messages to my brain (which are interpreted as pain). Instead I would feel a more pleasant (or at least tolerant) tingling (paresthesia).

There are two devices to choose from: RF or IPG. The RF has the battery outside the body and can be replaced easily or recharged like a cell phone; the IPG has the battery inside the body. It can only be replaced by surgery. According to the video, the RF seems more suitable to my complex pain problem; but I don't know exactly which device my doctor wants me to use.

I think I would much rather try the RF device. It can be increased and decreased, turned on and off and the battery can be recharged. Considering the nature of my pain, from my "lay" perspective, I would think it would be better.

That is my need. Wisdom to know what to do. So please remember me in your prayers. My appointment is at 12:30 at the Pain Clinic in Durham, NC.

resurrection sunday

Here we are after the service this morning: (from left to right) me, Donna, Sarah, and Kyle.

from the Senator

If you remember, in February, Democratic Senator Zell Miller made a stunning speech on the floor of the Senate about the "Deficit of Decency" in America.

I e-mailed the Senator commending him for his stand, and recieved this e-mail back today.

March 31, 2004

Dear Mr. Bohannon:


Thank you for your recent e-mail and I apologize for not getting back with you sooner. I have been overwhelmed by the correspondence I have received from Americans like yourself who share my concern about the Values Gap in this country today.


God has been at work since the beginning of this country. The first line of the Mayflower Compact states, "This voyage was taken for the glory of God and the advancement of the Christian faith." That's why they came. That's why they endured the hardships of a dangerous ocean crossing in a frail little vessel. And literally with a musket under one arm and a Bible under the other, they built this country. We must not forget that.


When the French journalist, Alexis de Tocqueville, traveled through this country he wrote about going into churches and seeing them "aflame with righteousness." That is what made this country great and that is the only thing that will keep it great. But we must also have our political leaders "aflame with righteousness."


I shall continue to fight to restore the America our Founding Fathers envisioned and I am proud and humbled that you are at my side. God Bless you and thank you for your support and prayers.


With kindest regards, I am
Sincerely,


Senator Zell Miller

Posted by micah at 01:13 AM

we made it...

We are here. We arrived home a little after 12. I just got online now. I am too tired to write anything else until tomorrow (today...).

When it rains, it pours

Yesterday was a rain day. Yes, a rain day. As opposed to a rainy day. Rain days for me are recooperation days. And I needed to. I slept a lot. I didn't read. I didn't talk to anyone much (gasp, so unsocialble); I really didn't do much of anything.

I felt better later. Enough to go to BJ's (the store, not University) to grocery shop with friends. That was an experience.

Later we had dinner, and we watched TV and talked. It was a good day. A rain day.

I can't believe how fast a week has gone by. Tomorrow is the last day for me in Greenville for a while. It was a really good time. 1 1/2 days left. I'll have to make the best of it. I'm going to Philosophy of Ed. again. That was an interesting class.

scattered

I went to classes today with my sister. I manged to make it to Modern Poetry at 8 am. Completely amazing. I also went to Chinese which was so fascinating, and the best was Philosophy of Education. I really enjoyed that class! Very interesting.

I ate lunch with my sister, I got to see Paul-Michael (I can't remember if you hyphenate your name or not!) at the Press. Got to go to the Snack Shop for Chai and a great chat with Dianna and Christa. Saw both Hillary and Gwen.

Ate dinner with the Youngs and had a great conversertion. They are always great conversation people. Ben, Stephanie and Katie (who rescued us by Googling) helped me find a MIDI of the Jupiter Hymn by Holst. I couldn't remember it, although I had been singing it a few hours before! Well, we heard it and then I went to play it at the piano. Very happy.

Now I'm at my friend's apartment. I haven't seen him in a few years as well. This has been a great trip. I was very tired though today. A little out of sorts. But I am feeling okay now.

Well, I've rambled enough.

walking

I think I shall start taking a walk every day. It is good for the heart, even if it hurts my foot. I am enjoying my time here so much!

Talk about a good family. How about the Youngs? They are the most gracious family. I love them so much.

follow the yellow brick road

I went hiking today with my sister and friends. It was a Paris Mountain trail I had not been on before. It is amazing what you can accomplish when you want to have fun with your friends despite being "broken." I hadn't even recovered from Hill's shindig yesterday. But I would not be hindered. And I made it too! I hope I don't regret it. Naw, I won't. I'll get all the fun in I can this week and recover next week.

On the way back from the trail to the car, we started singing various songs (from checkable sources). I was with Bob Jones students after all. We finally got to the Yellow brick road somehow, and since we were heading back to BJ, I guess we were off to see the Wizard.

I decided who was who: Dianna was Dorothy -- just for alliteration's sake; Christa was the Scarecrow...Hey, she's my sister I can say that she doesn't have a brain and still love her; Greg was the Cowardly Lion because he is "afraid" of snakes (I use sarcastic quotemarks.), and we did see him jump when he thought he saw one, or maybe he was trying to protect Dorothy? I was the Tin Man, because I'm rusty and walk funny -- and Jen says I have no heart.

Anyway, we had a marvelous time. We went to Pizza Hut for dinner, then to Atlanta Bread for cheese cake and coffee (yuck!) and tea.

Then I came home to practice with the Youngs. I'm taking up my accompanist role that I enjoy so much.

And look at me, I'm going to bed early.

no shoes

It was a rather full day, this concluding day of Bible Conference. It was such a blessing to be here, even if for only two days of the Conference.

A really exciting thing that happened today (and yesterday) was meeting some of Ben's Friends.

First of all, I met Miss Ubertati herself, Stephanie Geter.

Next I met Ben Kammer of Series of Doors.

And finally, I met one of our new bloggers, Jon Sligh of Shifting Sand

So, I still have a few people to meet from bensfriends. Watch out I might show up at your door step. You could tell your friends you met someone over the internet.

It was very nice to meet Jon and Kammer, we were able to talk for a while. They are tall. Very pleasant.

Benjamin, Stephanie and I had tea in downtown Greer yesterday. We walked around and saw the sights. It was a jolly good time.

I'll write more later when I can think straight. I am tired. I walked a lot today.

see you when I see you

I'm leaving in a few minutes with my mother to go down to Duke. My appointment is at 1pm.

I'll try to continue blogging while I'm in Greenville later this week.

grace and peace

in honor of spring

For lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.
The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of singing has come,
And the voice of the turtledove
Is heard in our land.

~ Ecclesiastes 2:11-12

It was a windy day in Virginia Beach, but a wonderful first day of Spring. It was nice. I got a tall tazo chai latte. And, alas, I got my hair chopped off.

But it really was a good day.

the plan has formed.

So...everything is set. The bags aren't packed yet, obviously, but Lord willing, I'll be down to Greenville March 25 - April 1.

I'm excited. I just wanted to make sure everyone knew, that I was planning to be there.

Have a nice night.

p.s.
I found out my friend 'Q' was going to be there too!

the plan is forming...

Bible Conference here I come. Well...sort of.

Right now it looks like I will be in Greenville on Thursday, March 25. That is the day after the big doctors appointment at Duke University, so please remember me in your prayers.

I will stay (hopefully) a whole week in Greenville.

I am very excited. I didn't get to see many people last time I was there because it was during the Christmas holidays, and it was a brief visit.

sweet hour of prayer

Well, I've not finished my piano arrangement, so I guess a book it is. I've been sick all day, but I am not discouraged. I feel like my spirit has been refreshed this week. I didn't realize how low my spirits had fallen. But the Lord knows and worked everything out to help me.

I will give thanks to the LORD according to His righteousness
        And will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.

~ Psalm 7:17 (NASB)

renewed strength

I asked the Lord to give me more strength. I get tired so easily. And He did.

Tuesday, I had the most wonderful time with the Sweedes working on a film script for a church project. And after lunch we talked and talked. It was such a blessing and time of refreshment.

Plus, today, I went over there again to have tea and chat some more. But this time Donna and I got the opportunity to talk about our respective writings which was very encouraging and exciting.

And the day didn't end there, because after teaching this evening I got it in my head to write a piano arrangement for the offertory on Sunday rather than playing something from a book I have. I am almost done and will finish it tomorrow. Half of it is already in Finale for printing purposes.

jbo 2.0

I have revised, updated, and all the rest. Hope you like it.

duke

I got a call from Duke University's Pain Clinic today. I now have an appointment for March 24, 2004 at 1:00pm!

Praise God! This is once again evidence of God's graciousness inspite of my little faith. I didn't expect to get in until summer.

God is faithful.

Bible Conference is that week. Yahoo Maps says it's about 4h41m to Greenville from Duke. Hmm...A plan is forming...

bigbluehat

For all of you folks who didn't know, bensfriends.com is sponsored by bigbluehat.com.

And now I have my very own sponsored by sticker in my sidebar.

oops...

Something I did to my Comments Templates have affected several other blogs:

Grace and Peace (David Morris)
A Glimpse...that Place
Simplicity
(hopefully, not more, I didn't see any others)

I will take that code out as soon as I can and I'll talk to Ben about that little problem. Okay? Nothing to worry about, really!

the workforce

So I had a job at McDonalds when I was in high school. Christa worked for Burger King during a summer, and now my brother has joined the ranks of fast food employees. He got a job at Hardee's.

I wonder how we managed to get jobs at three different restaurant chains?

In His Presence with great joy

Last night my friend's mom died. I only knew her for a short time while I was in Michigan, but she made an impact on my life. I stayed at her house with Brian and the family twice while I was there waiting for my apartment to be opened on campus.

I am sad, yet very happy that she is with the Lord. I hardly know what to say. She was suffering from cancer, but the Lord delivered her into His Presence.

Of all the verses that came to my mind these have stuck throughout the day, it is a benediction.

²⁴Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to make you stand in the presence of His glory blameless with great joy, ²⁵to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen.

~ Jude 1:24-25 (NAS)

Tylenol and the joy of laser printing

I had a really good day today. I had my first piano lesson with my new student and my first voice lesson with one of my neighbor's children. My neighbor's child comes to Pro-teens on Thursday night at my church. That is a blessing. I have never done voice lessons before, but I am confident I can give him a starting point in music and voice with which to continue if he wishes.

Also, another blessing, I got a laser printer (and there was much rejoicing, yea!). My dad was able to get one--for free. The joy of laser printing is how well music turns out. It looks perfect.

Last night, I learned that I cannot take Tylenol after I have taken my medicine. I am just glad I learned that lesson before driving and doing that!

I am looking forward to the Lord's Day. Last week the young people sang. I was very excited. I practice with them on Sunday nights before church. I suggest songs, but generally they choose them. Our main pianist (I play piano Sunday mornings, but most of the time I play the rickety organ--Lord help me to be thankful for it and not complain--any of you know of one we can have?) brought music for us to try, and it is so beautiful! It has the words to 1 Corinthians 13 (though they have been arranged with some liberty, not quoted) and the music is an American Folk song. It is song 109 in The Wilds book, and Psalm 42 or When I Survey the Wondrous Cross may be sung to it. If that gives you any hint. Anyway, the young people love it, and we are looking forward to singing it. We are also going to practice an arrangement of Revive Us Again for our Revival coming up at the end of February. Only a week left for that preparation. I hope I can find that book! I have been shuffling all my music around in an attempt to discover a system. No luck yet. I haven't given up yet though.

Anyway, I want to say, if I know you, I am praying for you. Well, in fact I am praying for the Body, so even if I don't know you I am praying for you. God bless you and keep you. Grace and peace in abundance be yours by God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

down with music

My primary care doctor is trying to get the referral in at Duke. I'm not sure it's completely up to his recommendation, but I know his referral is required. Once that is in, I still do not know what the process is getting into the pain clinic there.

Okay...I'm going to turn on some music and lie down for a bit. No more computer for a while.

musical selection:

Symphony No.3
by Saint-Saéns
I especially like "Maestoso" the 3rd movement.

bells and whistles

At my appointment this morning, Dr. Spear and I had a solemn conversation about my disease and his ability to treat me. He said he trusted the Naval Hospital's Pain Clinic and used to work with a chief doctor there. He refused to take advantage of my condition and repeat treatments that probably wouldn't help me. (In fact he didn't charge us for his consultation.) He confirmed that I am on the best medication for my condition. And he referred me to Johns Hopkins or Duke University. He considers me outside the Bell Curve of RSD patients. I have lived with this disease for 9 years.
So...

Pray that I can get into the Pain Clinic at either Johns Hopkins or Duke University. I think I'd like Duke. That way, I'd be closer to Greenville.

grace and peace

1, 2, 3, 4, 5

I am excited because...

1. I got a package in the mail.
2. Although it wasn't a check for a million dollars, it was from Tame the Pain, and they provided me with material on pain management options.
3. I am going back to a pain management clinic on Monday. Not the Naval Hospital, but a new clinic, with a new perspective.
4. I got a piano student today. She saw the ad in the newspaper Beacon.
5. The sun was shining all day--behind the rainy clouds.

pink storks

My cousin had her baby yesterday! The baby was born around 11:30 in the morning. Her name is Kayla Jane. I can hardly wait to see her.

whiter than snow

It was a snowy evening for church tonight. I love the snow. We just don't see it enough in Virginia Beach.

Our van

The street, sort of

hailing frequencies closed, sir

Well, that was an ordeal. When Mercutio said, "A plague o' both your houses!" in Romeo and Juliet I'm sure he meant the procedure I had today.
I won't go into the gritty details except to give some keywords:

four needles, shock treatment, grounded, vertebrae, 
X-rays, IV drugs, local anesthetic, hot, cold, pain,
 extreme pain, tired, 13:00-16:30 is a long time

Yes, I was conscious the entire time. They needed me awake to ask me questions, how nice for them.

I'm not bitter. Really. They were very kind and helped me through it. And now that I have pain medication for my back, I am thinking nice thoughts about them.

Well, this is it for my treatment. I will remain on my medication until we know if this procedure worked. And finally, a big thank you to Christa who waited patiently for me at the Hospital and who put up with my meanness until such time as I received my "drugs."

Thanks for your prayers.

hailing frequencies open, sir

My radiofrequency doodah is today at 13:30 at the Naval Hospital. Yea for me.

Your prayers are requested, roger. 10-4, over and out.

and away we go...again

Today's the day we are leaving for home. Virginia Beach that is. I've been away for three weeks and a day. I think I should very much like to sleep in my own bed. Not that beds/couches/floors weren't comfortable enough. There's something about coming home that you can't replace. It makes you wonder why you ever thought leaving would be so much fun.

Ben left this morning, so I am on my own for part of the day.
Christa is busily working at the Press. I thought we were leaving at 2h, but now it looks like 4h or later depending on her. She has the car. It doesn't matter. I am fine right here. I have plenty to do.

It takes about 7 and a half hours to get home from Greenville. Another road trip: and there was much rejoicing...Yea....

good day to you all.

and away we go...

We are leaving Texas today for the journey home. After a short stop in Atlanta to see my Uncle and his family, Christa and I are getting dropped off in Greenville.

I'll be staying until Tuesday afternoon with the Ideaman himself. Maybe I'll be able to see some of you South Carolinians that blog on Bensfriends.

grace and peace

pre-christmas eve singspiration

We had the Bohannons and the Sniders (both family sides, if you didn't gather that--I'm not trying to be insulting) plus people from the church my grandmothers attend for a little sing-athon yesterday night. We had mainly fingerfood for dinner, but it was delicious.

It was a good time. Not too much trouble. You know how family gatherings go.

My cousin rescued my sister, brother and me from the fray; we stayed at her house that night. We went to her work place today to see what she does. And then for the afternoon we vegitated to regain our strength.

Merry Christmas my friends! God bless you and keep you.
Grace and peace be yours in abundance!

pleasant afternoons

Today was nice. I got to hang out with my Aunt Lisa, whom I don't see very often. We went to Sears to pick up a present for my Uncle and then to Barns & Noble/Starbucks for some chat time. It was very pleasant. We have a lot in common because of our health problems. She gave me a lot of good advice about facing each day no matter what comes. God gives us the grace; we have to accept it.

Also, today my family will pull into town. Christa, Kyle, Mom and Dad should be here around 5pm central time. Grandma and I have been calling them every so often to find out where they are. I never realized how much my mother and sister sound alike on the phone. Both times I thought it was my sister and it turned out to be my mother.

It will be good to see Christa who has been at Bob Jones these past months working on finishing her Masters degree in English. Only one more semester Christa, one more.

family, food and fun

I got to see my Aunt Janet (check out her website 2nd Chance Rescue. Then Aunt Sarah and I went to Walmart for a shopping trip. I needed batteries for my camera to get some pictures to post here.

Church was at 6:30 and I got so see my other Grandmother (my mom's mother). Yes, my grandmothers go to the same church. They are best friends and sit beside each other in church. I think that is pretty cool.

After church, Grandma (my dad's mom) and Aunt Sarah and I went to Zeo's. Ever heard of it? It has better Italian food than Olive Garden and it's cheaper too! Unfortunately, I couldn't talk them into getting calamari for the appetizer. We had pepperoni bread instead. I didn't complain too much.

Then as a special treat we stopped by Starbucks for coffee and tea. I got tazo chai of course. Since coffee is evil. (Let's see if I can get any comments off that one.)

I love vacation!

I'm in Texas

We made it safely to the great state of Texas at 8:30pm central time. This is precisely the predicted time of arrival by my amazingly intuitive Aunt. I was driving by the University at 2:00am this morning. My sister wanted us to stop by, but we didn't make it in time.

We didn't manange to leave Virginia Beach until 6:00pm yesterday. But everything worked out just fine. We had a very safe trip and very little trouble. Our "cargo" holder on the roof rattled a bit until we figured out how to fix that. And Rosceaux wasn't happy about being in the back of the car, so he opted to stand/stick his head in between the two front seats all the way to Houston. I'll post a picture when I get it off my Aunt's camera.

I drove more than I expected I would, but the block seemed to help me manage my pain quite well. Plus, cruise control is a life saver.

We were able to stop in Albany, Louisiana for lunch at 3pm today at Eber's to get the best roast beef sandwhichs I've ever had. It was great. Sarah was surprised she remembered where the restaurant was after three years!

All in all, it was a very ok trip. We made excellent travel time considering all the stops we made. This included a three hour lay over in Georgia at 5:00am. There was only one spot of traffic that slowed us down in Louisianna. But it kept us from traffic in Beaumont, TX.

Oh, well, I am rambling. I am very tired and currently medicated.

P.S.
This is the first time I have blogged away from "home." It is pretty cool. I had to put the login page URL in my Palm to remember it. Okay. Done. I'll keep you apprised on my Christmas vacation. I hope that you will do the same for me.

grace and peace!

P.P.S.
I don't have my normal spell checker. I'll try to proofread very well.

on the road...soon

I shall be leaving today...sometime. I think noon is the estimated time of departure. My Aunt, Rosceaux (a Weimaraner) and I will be driving down to Houston, Texas. Well, really Alvin, but very close to Houston.

We are planning to drive straight through (21-23 hours, I think). So your prayers for our safety would be appreciated. Most of my extended family is in Texas. And my family-family will be driving down on Friday.

I'm looking forward to being there, not necessarily the driving though. The good news is we have pretty much packed up my Aunt's things (she is moving) and we need only to clean the house some more. Not too difficult.

Well, I need to get with it. I should have internet access at my Grandmother's house, so I'll keep blogging. I might not check my e-mail as much though.

grace and peace!

random thoughts

I packed boxes today (for my Aunt) and went to play practice. I managed to remember my lines (finally), but I ripped my vest, so I think I am going to wear something to cover my head. That will be an easier costume change.

I've noticed, after all the lifting I've done today, that when I stand up, I don't straighten my back out at all. That could be a problem. I'll see how I am tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow is the Christmas play for which I was rehearsing today. And I am leaving on Monday morning to spend 21-24 hours in a car driving to Texas. Hmmm...

No, I am not complaining. This is the Christmas season. We, of all people, have the most things to be thankful for. I know that's what we always say. And perhaps it has lost meaning because we say it readily without thinking. But I mean it! It's true.

Please pray for my friend's mom and his family. She isn't doing well. God is in control, though.

grace and peace!

prayer request

The Holy Spirit has put my friend and his family on my heart recently. But I didn't call him. I didn't even e-mail him until today. Finally.

God wants us to be sensitive to His voice. He doesn't speak to His people from Heaven anymore. But He makes Himself clear; I have no doubt of that. I should have obeyed Him.

I heard from my friend today, and he and his family need our prayers. His mother has been sick and she has received another difficult prognosis.

Please pray that God will heal her, give her doctors wisdom, and strengthen her family by His grace. Thank you very much.

grace and peace

today

I did not have the RFA procedure today. There was a mix-up. I had another lumbar sympathetic block. I am really mean right now too.

don't mention food

I seek your prayers today as I undergo one last procedure for the foreseeable future. It's at 12:30. I know some of you may see this post after I have the procedure, but I don't think it will matter. You can still pray for me then, too.

On a related note, I woke up this morning at 7:00 very suddenly and my first thought was, "Hey, that's not fair, I'm trying to fast, here." My room is next to the kitchen. I could smell breakfast loud and clear.

difficult questions

I've been thinking about this recently. I don't know anyone else really who has chronic pain. We've been pretty personal in recent days (transparency, by this shall all men know, in response) on ben's friends.

But this is a different kind of personal I think. I want to ask you about my medication. I think that medical science is good. Don't get me wrong. I think that is covered quite nicely by God's mandate to have dominion over the earth. The verse that keeps coming to my mind is Ephesians 5:18

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;

I know the interpretation. It is pretty straightforward. But do you think that an application of this verse could be pointed to me?

Here's the situation. I am taking 2400 ml grams of trileptal. This is to help me manage my pain. But what I am concerned with is being "drunk" on this medication. Does God want me to live on this? Or does He want me to trust His grace and be filled with the Spirit? Or is this medication His grace? I have struggled with this disease for 9 years. How do we recognize His grace? Sometimes it is so clear. Other times I want it, I need it...but I'm not sure if I see it. Am I a good, trusting Christian if I am lying there immobilized by pain? Am I a quitter because I left school?

Back to my point. The medication helps me. There is not doubt. But I have begun to realize that it has side effects just like other medications I have tried. I have random moments of lethologica and difficulty speaking. My concentration wavers at odd times (this makes me hesitant to drive). And I am very concerned that this drug is affecting my personality. (I have noticed since I've been on the medication that some of my habits have changed.)

I am not asking for a medical opinion, though I am planning on seeking one. I am asking for a spiritual opinion. I know that you might not have an answer. But I seek your prayers as well. Please think about this. If you have any ideas, please let me know. If you prefer not to comment, my e-mail address is towards the bottom of my index page in the sidebar.

Thank you for listening,
grace and peace to you in abundance!

christmas play

We had Christmas play practice at church this morning. It went rather well, praise the Lord. I am excited now. It is coming together.

I don't know what you would call our play. We have a great narration by Danielle Sweede. And we have scenes that picture the birth and life of Christ. Our focus is on the Gospel, not really His birth. The News of Christ's birth was announced by angels. I do think we should remark it; but the Gospel (1 Corinthians 15) is what we need to tell.

We are also talking about doing a Christmas movie for next year. We would film it this summer so we can get our college church members involved. We have the beginnings of a very interesting idea for the script too. But I'll not give it away yet.

Finally, I am thankful for Starbucks, even if I only drink chai and not coffee. No, really it's Starbucks chats that I find so enjoyable.

thanksgiving day reflections

Our Thanksgiving in Virginia Beach (actually, we were in Chesapeake) was delightful. The Bohannons, Castleberrys, a young Navy man from church, Donna's boyfriend, and D.J.'s friend crashed the Sweede's house and had a wonderful day. It was overcast that afternoon and sweater weather. A few drops fell from the sky, but not enough to stop the Castleberry kids, my brother and the Deborah from playing soccer.

After dinner, we had 10 people (most of the "kids") and the Sweede's puppy go for a walking tour of the golf course near the Sweede residence. I heard someone say we walked three miles. It felt like more to me. The moon was a bright crescent, partially veiled by clouds.

It was such a good day, and there was so much to be thankful for.

Praise God for family and friends, for food, for the beautiful creation, and for all His mercy to us.

you've won a free subscription

If you would like to subscribe to the jbo weblog, so that you will get an e-mail when I have posted, use the subscribe box in the sidebar on this page. It is located beneath the recent entries box.

You will get an e-mail confirming your subscription. After that, you are good to go. You don't need to paste any code into an e-mail and reply or such.

[for all you ben's friendsers out there: this subscription "hack" is available for you too. Go to bensfriends to find out more.]

turn the radio on...

Okay, this new procedure that I will have in two or three weeks, is going to be pretty interesting. By using radiofrequencies on the nerves that are causing me pain, the doctors are able to shut them down. Although, patients are supposed to keep realistic expectations (in other words, it might not work at all or not as well for some people as for others), the results from this procedure could last from months to years.

Okay, so if you want to read the article I sort of paraphrased from click here.

no french today

I had my latest injection today. Not too bad. I don't remember anything from today. I don't think I spoke in French. I'm pretty sure I didn't talk at all. I guess I am getting used to the procedure.

Well, we'll see how this works out. I am up for another appointment in two or three weeks. It will be a different procedure that I'll explain later.

fellowship

I had a really good time with friends from church last night. We were going to order pizza and play games, but somehow, we only got around to eating pizza and talking. It was awesome. Sitting around the living room for a few hours and just chatting. And the diversity of the situation was remarkable to me.

We had a few people who have basically grown up together in DSBC (I'm including myself in that group), then a few who in comparison are pretty new to the congregation, and then the couple in whose house we were meeting are pretty new believers.

Yet the bond of Christ knows no boundaries. We are family. It was a great time of fellowship, and I'm looking forward to more.

block

It's taking me about all day to feel well. I'm not complaining though. The block has been helping me!

--------------------------------------------------------------

Hey, any "MI-5" ("Spooks" in the UK) fans out there? I followed this season all the way through. I think the season finale was this past Tuesday, but it didn't say. It was awesome though.

"I'm going out, boys."

I had my second injection this afternoon. It was much better today than the first time. I had a different doctor who was much more interested in me as a person and very willing to explain everything.

I still don't remember the procedure (only vaguely of the sticking of a needle in my back, but that could have been the local). I know that when I first got the anesthesia I said, "I'm going out, boys."

Then later I know I spoke in French but all I remember saying is (in apology) "Parfois, je parle fran�ais*."

I woke up from the sedation much faster, but it still took the same amount of time for me to be released.

I am supposed to have one more injection, two weeks hence. Then the doctor suggested we try an additional treatment that I can't quite remember because of the sedation. But I'll find out.

Anyway, much better today. I'm okay. And if my back hurts a lot they gave me vicodin.

_________________________________

* Sometimes, I speak French.

Cold Water

(Proverbs 25:25) Like cold water to a weary soul, So is good news from a distant land.

I guess Michigan counts as a distant land if I am in Virginia. I am having the most delightful conversations with friends from Saginaw, MI! I love my friends and church from Saginaw. I pray that God will get me back up there to them and to Immanuel some day.

I am just so thankful to have such good friends. Here in Virginia; there in Michigan; down in South Carolina; and all these friends I'm making blogging.

Thank you all for loving me and for praying for me!

grace and peace,
jmb

Orange Ribbon

In an effort to improve awareness of Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy/Complex Regional Pain Syndrome, here's a link to the facts page of rsds.org.

Just the facts, please!

This is the problem I have been dealing with for these many years. I am one of the people that got it without knowing exactly what I did to cause it. It started with my right foot and has spread to my right knee and hip. Fortunately, I am receiving medical treatment at a Pain Clinic.

I will praise Him

I went to the Pain Clinic again today. I was disappointed with the results of the "epidural" last weekend. I was expecting more than 72 hours of relief. But my doctor explained to me how things work. First of all, he said, there is no easy all or nothing solution in most cases. Though I should have been expecting a miracle with all the prayer going on for me, but I guess my faith was weak, or I still have my infirmity for the glory of God so that His works can be manifest in me.

Second, my doctor explained to me that these injections (lumbar sympathetic block) usually work better in a series. Therefore, I am going to have two or three more in the next few weeks. November 3rd is the next one scheduled. Plus, my medication has been maxed out. I'm going to be taking 2400mg of Trileptal� (oxcarbazepine) a day. Yea for prescription drugs! No, seriously, this medicine seems to be working the best without many side effects.

When it comes down to it, Pain Clinic or no, pain or no, God is in control. And I will praise Him while I have breath.

test

I am trying to figure the scripturizer plug-in. I think I changed what Ben said, but I'm not seeing anything different.

Well here's a verse for good measure, I am choosing one at random:

Isaiah 35:3

Hey, it works! Awesome.

Check that verse out too, it is a good one.

epidural

Danielle you will be delighted to know that it was an epidural I got today at the Pain Clinic (well, it was a special kind).

Seriously, it wasn't as bad as imagination makes it out to be. I actually passed out from the anesthesia so I don't remember the procedure at all.

I remember speaking a lot. I said "indeed" several times. I remember speaking in French a little. Mainly I remember praying to God (when I woke up a little bit later) and thanking Him for staying with me and for how good He is. It's nice to know that even under the drugs I still remembered to thank Him. And finally, I thought of some songs. No singing out loud (I hope) but I was thinking about music.

Now though I just have a stiff back and a warm foot. But if all goes well, this will help with my symptoms.

Thanks for your prayers.

Updates and Thank You's

I've been trying to figure out this whole CSS thing. I think I am getting the hang of it.

I've changed some of the colors and made my font a bit bigger. Benjamin is still going to do some of the hard work that I don't have the code for (or knowledge probably).

It occurred to me the other day that I have had this blog for just a little over a year.

Thanks Ben, for hosting this thing and setting it up and all the things that you've done to help me. I'm really looking forward to continued blogging. And I am enjoying meeting and reading from this remarkable community we have going here between Ben's Friends and Andriven.

grace and peace be yours in abundance!

My own "scheduled pain"

I have "scheduled pain" tomorrow. Joy asks what is it? Well, I'm not exactly sure what's going on.

Jbo, you ask in shock, don't you ask your doctor what he's going to do?

Of course, gentle reader...but I still don't know exactly what's going on.

Here's the run down:

1) 9th grade: my right foot turned blue. "they" gave me shoe inserts and said i was better.

2) after graduation: musical ministry team, me in agony, the shoe inserts not a solution.

3) that summer before going to bob jones in the fall: bouncing around to different doctors at portsmouth naval hospital

4) ah ha! you have Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy go to pain clinic, third floor, and to your right.

5) pain clinic gives me drugs that distort reality and make me depressed

6) i go to bob jones. have a tough first year

7) go to pain clinic again, change medicine, not enough, still weird thinking from mind altering meds

8) finally find something that helps

9) junior year, 2 semester have to leave bob jones, things only getting worse

10) saginaw valley state university, met really awesome people and found a good godly church where God had sent me to grow in Christ Jesus

11) home again, tomorrow pain clinic

So here I am again. Off to the pain clinic I go. The doctors are going to do a spinal block or something like that. Danielle said I was getting an epidural. Maybe. In any case just think: big needle in between vertebrae = not good, (well, maybe good).

This is primarily for diagnostic purposes, but it may also provide relief. I pray it's both.

Some things I've learned. God is good. God is in control. Because even if everything imaginable "goes wrong," you can still delight yourself in the LORD. Sometimes I'm down. But God is still with me, reminding me to trust in Him.

Isabel

I've never been so thankful for electricity in my life. The power came back on at 7:10 pm.

We had no electricity for approximately 8 days, 5 hours and 36 minutes. And all I can say is that it could have been much worse.

Thankfully, the Lord protected the church and made sure there would be electricity there. He takes care of His own.

God is good. He protected us and provided for us. Praise His Name!

jmb

vantage

We were talking about point of view in my philosophy class on Tuesday night. God has given us each a point of view. For now I am talking about a physical point of view. If I were standing on the left side of a desk and you were standing on the right side, we would each see the desk differently. It is easy to see that each of has a point of view physically.

But we also have a metaphysical point of view. As we approach an idea or issue, each of us brings his or her own perspective to that discussion. One's upbringing, beliefs, convictions, and faith shape a person's perspective and how he or she will face that idea or issue.

As a Christian when I enter a Natural History museum, I automatically bring my faith in God as Creator with me. Therefore, when I see displays that give evolutionary dates, I reject those immediately.

It is harder for us to realize, I think, that other Christians, by virtue of their unique upbringing, beliefs, and convictions can have different positions than our own. I think we get caught up in our own point of view so often because of tradition that we think that everyone else must be wrong because they don�t do it our way.

I'm not preaching ecumenicalism. Not at all. We have to remember that we are to be separate and holy. But also of like mind. It's okay if we differ on some traditions or church government or translations.

But we need to be Spirit filled so that our point of view is derived from Scripture and our paths directed by Providence.

jmb

(Proverbs 3:5-6 NASB) Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And do not lean on your own understanding. {6} In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.

open-mindedness

I had my first Practical Reasoning class this evening. I knew that going into it, the class was going to be difficult. As Christians we have values, principles, and commands from God Himself that must be obeyed and cannot be contravened by man's reason. My first class was about the fair-minded, critical thinker. The instructor gave us an essay that he had written and that he uses as an introduction to his course.

There were many things in this essay that I could agree with, but most I have to hold at arms length and examine them in light of Scripture.

I hope that you will engage me in this topic that was very prevalent in Mr. Hilton's essay: Open-mindedness.

I simply want to ask some questions, and perhaps get some responses back.

Two of the essay's definitions of open-mindedness are
receptive to new ideas,
a willingness to be persuaded.

How receptive can a Christian be to new ideas? Or should I say, how receptive should a Christian be to the new philosophies of the World? How does one define receptivity? Is receptiveness an attitude of freely listening?

Should a Christian be willing to be persuaded in any argument? How do we draw the line? How do we discern which arguments we can be willing to be persuaded on and which we cannot before we hear the argument?

As you can see this is an interesting question. I hope you don't think I am floundering. I am not. "But in the multitude of counsellors there is safety" (Proverbs 11:14 KJV). So please ponder this and answer or ask more questions.

jmb

A Vision for the Lost Part II

I've never actually revisited a post that I wrote until now.

In A Vision for the Lost, I made the statement "[My Sunday School teacher] said that Satan gives his children (the unsaved) a special vision to see what Christians are doing wrong. [This] is such a simple statement of truth."

One of my dear friends asked me for Scripture on this. And it occurred to me that I didn't have any. This wasn't an argument between us, she just wanted to think about this statement more and it forced me to do some more thinking too.

I just wanted to add a little to what I said. I believe this is true. The only example that I could come up with in the Bible (out of my head) was the Pharisees and how they constantly sought for Christ's one mistake. But as the Son of God, Jesus was blameless before them and all men.

I think what I failed to make clear was that this statement is a spiritual insight, not a specific reference to Scriptures about Satan and the unsaved. It is about experience, and although God uses our experiences to teach us, what He makes clear is that "we have the prophetic word made more sure" (2 Peter 1:19 NASB). It is ultimately the Bible and not our feelings, nor our experience that we must rely on.

jmb

A Vision for the Lost

My substitute Sunday School teacher, a deacon in our church, made the most profound statement yesterday. It was in relation to his testimony and I hope that it will stick with me and you as we live our Christian lives.

He said that Satan gives his children (the unsaved) a special vision to see what Christians are doing wrong.

It is such a simple statement of truth. I know we aren't perfect people. By God's grace, we are what we are (1 Cor. 15:10). But we have to be careful not to hinder God's work. We have to be on guard because Satan isn't going to allow unsaved people to see the good we do often times, he is going to give them a special vision to see those things we are failing at.

But don't be discouraged, because Paul says, "but thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ" (1 Corinthians 15:57 NASB).

peace and grace to you,
jmb

Two are better than one...

(Ecclesiastes 4:9) Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.

Now I haven't had a chance to study that, so if it's out of context please forgive me. It is the first verse that came to mind to me during my Neurology appointment today.

I went to see Dr. Buday, but after serveral minutes he called his associate Dr. Lawrence in to examine me too. I have to admit this was the first time that I actually felt that the doctors were really seeking the cause of my problem. And I am very grateful to the Lord.

The result: I started a new medication today, so please pray that that helps. Also, I have another MRI scheduled next week on the 6th of November.

Your continued prayers are, as always, welcome. And know that I am in prayer for you.

"Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who has loved us and given us eternal comfort and good hope by grace, comfort and strengthen your hearts in every good work and word."

(2 Thessalonians 2:16-17)

jmb

Building Each Other up with Dynamite

I haven�t written a blog in a while. I�ve been pretty down in recent days. I had a few things in mind for a blog, but I hadn�t felt motivated to write one until tonight. I am going to try to please everyone.

When Danielle (not Danielle Jennifer) and I were talking on Instant Message the other day, I said I would write a blog on compliments. You know as Christians we should be nice people. We should say nice things about each other. Often though, we talk about the bad things people do and not the good things. I know I am guilty of that. Our focus is wrong. (Forgive me, this won�t be deep, I am just going to ramble: this last sentence for example. Our focus is wrong. We say that a lot, I suppose. But what do you think about when you say it? I just really thought about what that sentence is saying. Yes, you guessed it: analogy time. Let�s talk about photographs. Have you ever taken a beautiful picture, well, it would have been but it was a little out of focus? That�s what that sentence means.) So (if you are still following me) if our focus is wrong what should it be on? Jesus.

See, no deep thoughts tonight. Just Jesus. And isn�t it great that He is enough? My inspiration to write about Him tonight is because of a poem that my cousin sent me. She based it on II Corinthians 12:9:

�And he said unto me, �My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.� Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.�

Let�s talk about that �power of Christ.� (This is for Casey!) The word �strength� and the word �power� in the King James is the same word in the Greek: dunamis. That�s the word from which we get dynamite. And what we need to remember is that it means �miraculous power.� We have �miraculous power� because of God�s grace.

I�m sure now, you want me to tie it all together. Well, let me try: When we are weak, let�s get our focus on Jesus. His grace is our �miraculous power.� When our focus is right, we will build up our brothers and sisters in Christ (I Thessalonians 5:11), not tear them down. So now I want to compliment my sister in Christ, Wendy O. Thank you for honoring Christ in your life by being so kind.

God bless and keep you. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all,

james micah bohannon

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My Grace is Sufficient for Thee
M. Snider

As the path I travel seems drear,
Remind me, O Lord, You are near.
Close beside me, to lead and to guide me,
Jesus, what have I to fear?

You've said, "My grace is sufficient for thee,
For my strength is made perfect in weakness."
Empty before Your throne I grieve,
Father I fall down to my knees,
For when I am weak, then am I strong
Because Your grace is sufficient for me.

I delight to do Thy will, O my God,
Yea, Thy law is within my heart,
But often times I am so weak,
I stumble before I can start.
Show me the way You'd have me to go,
Never leading me to wrong,
And when I feel frail, remind my heart,
You alone are my strength and my song.

You've said, "My grace is sufficient for thee,
For my strength is made perfect in weakness."
Empty before Your throne I grieve,
Father I fall down to my knees,
For when I am weak, then am I strong
Because Your grace is sufficient for me.

Love that Brooks No Questions

"For the despairing man there should be kindness from his friend; Lest he forsake the fear of the Almighty."

Job 6:14

I was thinking of this verse this morning. I want to thank Brian for taking me to the doctor on Monday. And I want to thank Jen for shopping with me (do you want to buy some boots?). And also thank you, Kara and Casey for game night at your home. I�d also like to thank those who have prayed, that is a help too.

In this passage, Job is talking to his visiting friends. His argument deals with people (namely, himself) who are suffering, that have said things they should not have said. In the very next verse (Job 6:15), he accuses his friends of being like a wadi (�brook� in the King James). A wadi is a Middle Eastern streambed that is plentiful in the rainy season, but dry in the summer, when water is hard to find.

The word �kindness� in verse 14 is the Hebrew word chesed. It is often translated �lovingkindness� or �loyal love.�

I want to thank you all for your �loyal love.� It has been a constant blessing to me, and it has reminded me that �loyal love� is to be my response to God during trials. My �loyal love� for my Heavenly Father increases my faith in Him. And it helps me to know that He is seeking the absolute best for my life.

Have you ever wondered why some people break and crack and ultimately reject God when trials enter their lives? One reason, I am persuaded, is that their friends are like the deceitful wadi. Don�t be like �the stream of brooks that pass away;� but be loyal in love and devotion both to God and to man.

james micah

The Bridge that was Higher than I

Well, I saw Dr. Kochar today.

The good news is I have a brain. The bad news is...I have a brain. ???

The truth is Dr. Kochar cannot explain my symptoms. So for right now, I do not have MS. But I am going to take my MRI films to see another neurologist just to make certain. And hopefully he will be able to help me. If not...then that's okay.

Thanks for your support. I love you all.

james micah

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from my friend, danielle jennifer:

He is your center and He WILL hold.

Is He yours?

jmb

about the title:
Brian and I waited on the draw bridge. It was an adventure, right Brian?

The Trial by the Tor

Last night was pretty rough. I had thoughts of going to the emergency room.

For seven years I have been going to the docTOR. It�s hard for me to go to see one. And I couldn�t help but think of a tor�a high rocky hill�that I have to climb every time I drag myself to see a doctor.

Now, I find myself in the greatest trial of my life: I am sitting in the dock waiting for the verdict. You see, I have to wait for the DOCKtor to tell me if I have a life long illness or not.

But I cannot forget there is a Great Physician. And He climbed the tor of Golgotha for me and for you. And though I should have been in the dock�an enclosure in a court of law where the defendant sits during the trial�He took my place. And though He committed no crime, He accepted my punishment. By His blood I am justified (Rom. 5:9). And through His resurrection, by God�s mercy, I have a living hope (1 Pet. 1:3).

james micah

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I will give thanks to the LORD according to His righteousness, And will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.

Psalms 7:17

Potato with your Soup?

Although many of you, dear readers, have sent messages to cheer me up--and I am thankful for all of them!--tonight, I got an e-mail from a special friend who sent a verse that I'd like to share. Deborah, thank you so much for sending me this passage, I really needed it tonight.

But now, thus says the LORD, your Creator, O Jacob, And He who formed you, O Israel, "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine!
"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, Nor will the flame burn you."

Isaiah 43:1-2

I don't think any comment is needed, do you? Isn't our God wonderful?

james micah

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If you are wondering about the title of today's log, it has to do with Pam, Jen and I (and another table of church folk) eating out after the morning service. You have to love a good cup (or bowl, Jen) of potato soup on a rainy, sweater-day.

I love comments. So please, feel free.

Road Trip

Thank God for friends. Brian, Danielle, and Jen made my MRI appointment the best "doctors" visit yet. Thanks guys.

Well, the MRI only took 12 minutes. And only a few minutes after that I had the films that showed my brain. It was strange seeing it. But I kind of liked it.

Now...the waiting...my next appointment, when my films will be read, is Monday, September 30. So, pray that God will give me patience and grace not to worry. I am in His care: He's my Father and He wants the best for me.

Well, I need to eat my Taco Bell, that high intensity magnetic field made me hungry.

james micah

why jbo?

My name is james micah bohannon. My parents and family all call me micah. But by some friends, and in the state of Michigan, I am called james. I don't mind this duality, it has never bothered me. It does confuse some people, though.

It is probably apparent now why jbo, it comes from james and my last name. It was developed as a nickname by a good friend of mine who will remain nameless. It became very popular at Bob Jones University and has stuck with me. Welcome to jbo.

just the facts:

• dreamer (how can one not be, when he's a friend of the crazy dreamers?)
• not particularly fond of chocolate, will eat it occasionally (espicially if covering a cherry)
• musician
• likes to write from time to time
• Me Zhaïrhiànde onsepitone avhènba.¹
• I have been chosen.

location: virginia beach, VA (city)
Location: 36.73936 N, 76.04367 W
Population: 426,800
Area: 643.2 sq km (land), 151.0 sq km (water)
Zip code(s): 23451, 23452, 23454, 23455, 23456, 23459, 23462, 23464

There is one town in the United States named Bohannon, and I've been there.

Bohannon, VA 23021

¹I have an invented language.