A Glimpse...That Place

Dum, Dum, Dadda, Dadda, Dum, Dadda

The title is the words to a song with hand motions that go increasingly faster as you reach each verse. I'm sure you guys wanted to know that.

Anyway, YIPPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!! Finals are over and we're almost free!!!! This is the most I've wanted to go home in the longest time. The world right now is not going well. A good friend of mine is denied re-enrollment. And that absolutely stinks. Let's just say a cry session and a destroying session is over. argg.

Anyway, some people asked a while ago why I am called Fae and why I'm the embodiment of an oxymoron and why I'm called Samwise. So, here is my answer.

My name: Well, I have this weakness for fairies. All right, they are my favorite fantasy creature. Well, the Irish name for fairies is spelt faere. I also love any winged things, everything from angels to lady bugs to birds (my favorite animal is the peregrin falcon because it lives high up on craggy peaks and can dive at speeds up to 200 mph. yeah buddy). But I myself do not have wings. So my name is Fae, the Irish spelling, without the r and e which symbolize my wings, which I have not earned yet. Did you get that? I hope you do.

I am the embodiment of an oxymoron. I grew up with three brothers, so I fell in love with Legos, tree-climbing, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But I absolutely love twirly dresses or skirts. And I love dressup and make-up and doing nails, hair, and everything else girly. So while I was playing Barbies, I was also taking them to the "movies" to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoons. I would climb trees in twirly skirts and I would play house with Legos.

Also, I got the nickname Samwise because I love the Lord of the Rings (my roommates think I am obsessed with it) and because my roommate from last year also knew Lord of the Rings (she's April's, Kat's, sister). And then April's roommate (go Johanna) started calling me that and it kind of stuck with me (it also works with my last name which starts with a "g"). Though, you would have to ask Key or Kat if I really am like Samwise, a loyal to-the-very-end kind of friend (I think I am, but hey, that's just my preception of myself which could be completely different from reality).

I think that covers everything.

Have a great Christmas and an even better new year!

Fae (without wings)

The Jock

A certain someone said that I could post short stories on this thing. So here it goes. This is the short story I did for my Creative Writing class. Just please give me feedback of any kind, and seriously, I love constructive criticism. But if all you want to do is rave about it, I love that too. :)

Fae

P.S. Thoughts are inside * *. Just thought you might want to know.

He searches for his keys as he walks towards his car, parked behind the theater. A disappointing football game ends his long day. He stops and tries to remember. *Where are those dratted keys?* he thinks. He puts his stuffed gym bag down on the pavement in order to fully search through his pockets. *Ahh, here they are.* They are in his left-hand pocket. He now remembers putting them there after they slipped out when he was changing into his uniform.

A poster advertising �The Boyfriend� is plastered on the side of the theater, announcing the upcoming spring musical. *I hope Jennifer doesn�t want to see that. I won�t be able to handle people bursting into song at random.* He arrives at his car, drops off his bag, and heads toward the theater after he picks up his cello case from the trunk. The theater should be empty because he saw practically everyone at the game and everyone he didn�t see; the goths, the punks, the druggies, were all getting high or amusing themselves in weird ways. All he wants to do is play his music. He tries the back door; it�s open.

He slips in and takes a look around. *Perfect!* He makes his way to the stage dodging half-constructed props and bright, partially-painted backdrops. He smells the fumes, still thick in the air.

With only the hallway giving light he moves around the stage and looks at his shadow on the theater seats. He finds a wooden chair at random giving it a weird look. He pulls the chair to the center of the stage, sits down, and opens his case.

He puts the rosin on the bow, while choosing which song he should play. He�s memorized a piece by Stravinsky. *This should sound nice.* He draws the bow across the strings hearing how the sound echoes off the walls.

The first few notes are always hard to get into, but tonight, he feels the pull of the music. Mrs. Johnson, his teacher, doesn�t think that emoting music is a good thing. �One has to be strict in one�s interpretation of a piece,� was her favorite line. She always told him to go by what the composer wrote, not the emotions hinted. But she isn�t around, he can express himself as much as he wants and this vacant auditorium presents the ideal opportunity.

The song he chooses is perfect for the way he feels. This was not a good night for football. He tried to be focused during the game, but he barely made any tackles. Everyone depended on him to be the best linebacker against their rivals. Tonight, though, he was off. Nothing worked. The Willsonville Wombats won 24 to 12. He couldn�t be more disappointed in himself. And right now, he vents his frustrations of missed tackles and lost touchdowns. He expresses the pressures he feels from everyone, his coach, his teammates, his family, his friends, all through the music. He closes his eyes, giving in to the power of the piece.

The notes dip and soar resonating off the dark walls. He forgets what he wants and feels the lull music always brings, something he never feels with football. He looses himself in the song indulging in the sound of his cello.

*Somebody is here.* Suddenly, he feels someone�s stare on him and his instrument. He opens his eyes in time to see someone else�s shadow from the hallway light as they leave. He stops, guilty at being caught in a place he shouldn�t have been. He jumps up, packing his cello as rapidly and delicately as possible.

�No, don�t go,� a girl�s voice rings out. He glances up and sees her clothes are all black and she�s wearing thick black eyeliner. The only color on her comes from the red choker at her neck. It�s one of the goths. He stills, not trusting her.

"Don't go," she repeats. "That was a beautiful song. I was just admiring your gift." *She thinks this is a gift? This is only the result of years of practice and a nagging mother.* He wants to be alone with his music and this girl wants to interrupt him. He turns and silently inches towards the door.

He hears the clunking of her combat boots coming nearer. "Where'd you learn how to play?" *She doesn�t need to know anything.* He lengthens his stride, eager to get out.

"Wait, don't go! Please." He looks at her seeing the sincerity in her eyes. He hesitates. "I'm here most evenings," she says. "The back door is always open. Mr. Mefford has given me the keys so I can work on the costumes. You're welcome to come and play again. I promise I won't bother you. I promise. Please, just consider it.

�Please,� she pleads. Her face gives off a sort of helpless, wide-eyed look, like a kid wanting something only he can give. She looks like she�s trying to preserve something, something he finally did right. *Interesting, she wants to hear me play. No one wants to hear me play. No one thinks I can play.* He turns to leave again. She sighs. He turns back and tilts his head. He looks her up and down. *Can I trust a goth?* He looks her in the eye and nods, ever so slightly, to signal his agreement of the terms.

From A Friend

A BLESSING FOR YOU, AND HOPEFULLY BACK TO ME

"I wish for you...

Comfort on difficult days,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart

Gentle hugs when spirits sag,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Confidence for when you doubt,

Faith so that you can believe,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
And love to complete your life.

God Bless you!

I asked the Lord to bless you
To guide you and protect you
As you go along your way....

His love is always with you
His promises are true
No matter what the tribulation
You know He will see us through

So when the road you're traveling on
Seems difficult at best
Give your problems to the Lord
And God will do the rest.

~ from Serien

God blesses in little ways
not always grand
when your attitude
gets dragged behind you
and you feel that you can't stand

then God sends something touching
or unexpected too
from a friend you didn't realize
had been thinking about you.

Night Before Christmas

This poem was written by a Marine stationed in Okinawa Japan. And I got it in a forward from a friend. Just take a little bit and read it, it'll make you think.
Have a great night
Fae

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS,
HE LIVED ALL ALONE,
IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF
PLASTER AND STONE.

I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY
WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE,
AND TO SEE JUST WHO
IN THIS HOME DID LIVE.

I LOOKED ALL ABOUT,
A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE,
NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS,
NOT EVEN A TREE.

NO STOCKING BY MANTLE,
JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND,
ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES
OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.

WITH MEDALS AND BADGES,
AWARDS OF ALL KINDS,
A SOBER THOUGHT
CAME THROUGH MY MIND.

FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT,
IT WAS DARK AND DREARY,
I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER,
ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY.

THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING,
SILENT, ALONE,
CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR
IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.

THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE,
THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER,
NOT HOW I PICTURED
A UNITED STATES SOLDIER.

WAS THIS THE HERO
OF WHOM I'D JUST READ?
CURLED UP ON A PONCHO,
THE FLOOR FOR A BED?

I REALIZED THE FAMILIES
THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT,
OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS
WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.

SOON ROUND THE WORLD,
THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY,
AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE
A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.

THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM
EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR,
BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS,
LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.

I COULDN'T HELP WONDER
HOW MANY LAY ALONE,
ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE
IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.

THE VERY THOUGHT
BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE,
I DROPPED TO MY KNEES
AND STARTED TO CRY.

THE SOLDIER AWAKENED
AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE,
"SANTA DON'T CRY,
THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE;

I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM,
I DON'T ASK FOR MORE,
MY LIFE IS MY GOD,
MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS."

THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER
AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP,
I COULDN'T CONTROL IT,
I CONTINUED TO WEEP.

I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS,
SO SILENT AND STILL
AND WE BOTH SHIVERED
FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL.

I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE
ON THAT COLD, DARK, NIGHT,
THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR
SO WILLING TO FIGHT.

THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER,
WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE,
WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA,
IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE."

ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH,
AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND,
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT."

A Funny Pause

This Saturday's been kind of hectic, so I thought a small break would be in order. That, and I wanted to show Kat how to put pictures on the blog! Woot!

Ummm..........Hi!

Okay, first of all, I would like to say that, Yes, I am still alive. And second, if you guys don't go see Alice in Wonderland, I will beat you. *smirk*
Anywho, I just that you guys needed some comfort to know I hadn't been raptured, yet. But I do feel like I will fall over sometime soon because of my overbooked life.
I probably won't be blogging for a bit, just because there are so many things going on. But I will start again if I have some more free time. I only wish we could post short stories on this thing. Cause I've got a great one for you all.
Well anyway, I praying for everyone who reads this things, and I hope you all have a great weekend.
Fae/Samwise/Duchess

The Psychotic Trio

Just wanted to let Ben know that I LOVE Moveable Type. I've done quite a bit of my own html stuff, and this is SO easy. Yay-rah for Ben, as Uber would say.

A picture of the three hobbits...sans our newest, whom you will get to meet soon, we hope...

Funny Times

Let 'em roll, in my opinion. If being scared by Dr. Bob and watching your best friend almost fall into the fountain during the Lighting Ceremony isn't funny, then I don't know what is. Kudos to Robbie for saving Kat from the freezing landing.

Today I just considered myself really blessed. And it wasn't an unusual day, by any means.

You know, work at 7 a.m. and my getting-me-up-and-to-breakfast buddy wasn't ready so we missed the meal altogether, slicing all morning and getting to society to vote for officers that I don't even recognize.

Then seeing my advisor who doesn't know my name and getting the schedule that only I understand approved (Yay!) and getting the choices for my minor narrowed down to History or English. (Another blessing, as I've been agonizing for months about it.)

Next, taking a child psychology test that utterly didn't go well, to taking a nap with Karen for a glorious hour!!!! (and another ! for good measure). Watching a movie in Principles of Communication that was so outdated it gave us all a much-needed laugh. (Did you know that the guy on the Price is Right looks the same now as he did during the Reagan administration? Scary.)

Then rushing to French class, to discover that I got the first A- on a quiz all semester, and I hardly even studied at all, because of the time crunch that day, to singing French Christmas carols at the end of class. Then getting back to the dorm and receiving an email from my mother about an additional $50 that Toshiba forgot to refund me initially, and knowing it will just cover my cellphone bill!

And then a work party right after the Lighting Ceremony where I got to eat homemade food. And then arriving back in the dorm to be tackled by three of the best hobbits in the world because they missed me horribly while I was gone for two and a half hours.

Amazing. Amazing how God works.

And did I mention the mint coughdrops Uber gave me? All she had, and it happened to be my favorite kind. WHAT a blessing!

Slick

What is it about freezing rain?
By all accounts it should make a soul feel dreary and cold, but I was so excited! Must be the Northener in me. People on campus must think it's odd for a girl to go walking merrily down the sidewalk, singing through her scarf to herself.
I think that today was the best day of the week, mostly because of the weather. So maybe I'm a little strange. That shouldn't surprise anybody! Now all we need is snow....lots and lots of snow....

freezing rain
little icicles
reminds me winter
and Christmas
aren't too far off

I'm Sick

I'm sick of being strong
I'm sick of waging wars
I'm sick of walking a tightrope
So thin it cuts me in half

Just leave me alone
But you're never alone
Let me nurse my own wounds
I don't want any help
Maybe not, but we'll give it

Be angry, be sad
I'm sorry that you are
But when you see
I'm not worth the trouble
You're a trouble that's worth everything

Ignore me for awhile
We wouldn't do that
Ignore me forever if you need to
We never will
When I come back
I'll be sorry you've gone
We'll have followed you there

I don't know me anymore
I don't want to
You know me, you don't
But we want to

I lie to everybody
Even myself
You're human
What makes you and I special?
That God loves us.

So many I's
But I can't help it
We're human